albuquerque ketamine clinic

The Ketamine Academy: An Interview With The Creator Of The Online Ketamine Infusion Therapy Course

The Ketamine Academy: An Interview With The Creator Of The Online Ketamine Infusion Therapy Course

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Hello again. This is Susan from myketaminestory.com. I am a blogger that suffers with Treatment Resistant Depression (TRD), Anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I was introduced to Ketamine for TRD in January 2015. I am forever grateful that I was. I spent the first two years focused on my recovery. I now have an excellent treatment plan in place but that does not clear me from obstacles or pitfalls. I journal regularly. I educate and advocate for Ketamine Therapy to help treat depression. I write for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, entirely based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years.

If you joined me last week then you already know that I announced the exciting news about The Ketamine Academy; an online Ketamine provider training program. I examined the Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course and shared my introduction to this new program in my last blog, Introducing The Ketamine Academy: An Online Ketamine Provider Training Course. This week I am ecstatic to finally share with you part one of my in depth two part interview with Mr. Jason Duprat, the founder of The Ketamine Academy and creator of the first online training course to help practitioners establish their own Ketamine clinic in order to provide more people suffering with Treatment Resistant Depression (TRD) and Chronic Neuropathic Pain Conditions access to this innovative drug Ketamine.

Ketamine is a life saver.

I constantly write about my journey with Ketamine on several different platforms. Ketamine was a huge game changer for me. When Ketamine was first mentioned in my home I can honestly say that my video game screen clearly stated “Game Over”. I was finished. I had nothing left. All the health packs and power ups were obsolete. I had fallen off the grid and all my extra lives were long gone. I was free falling. Darkness. Nothing. My game status was over. I was only a shadow of my character. It would be many levels before I was even aware the game changed platforms. I had hit a glitch.  Ketamine. It rebooted this game called life. I was given another chance. I can’t express enough how immensely thankful I am that my dark, bloody, and violently featured game has been retired. I have Ketamine now. It is easier to be grateful.

I have been an active advocate of Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression since January of 2017. It took me several years of regular Ketamine treatments to climb out of the rabbit hole I was lost in for decades. I can’t begin to express how Ketamine has influenced my life. I try weekly. I ruminate. I dream of my words pulling back all the darkness for those suffering with clinical depression. The kind of depression that has no face. It is not situational. It is not prolonged grief. This mask may appear to be smiling but it is an expression that was molded on the day I learned just how different my world was. It was a safety call. I needed to suit up and play my part brilliantly so as not to be discovered as the fraud I felt I was. Depression kills. It almost claimed me. I can physically and emotionally feel the lies “depression” whispers in my ear when the Ketamine fades between appointments. They scream. It pains me. The depression and anxiety are loud and powerful distractions and are impossible for me to silence without Ketamine Therapy. It was with the assistance of Ketamine treatments that I was capable of digging my way back to the surface. That rabbit hole, it still exists for me, but the opening has shrunk. I don’t slip too far into the chaos now. I skip around the forest and embrace the sunshine. I resent knowing I could blindly tumble at any moment into that familiar trap and be lost for days. However, sneaking away from the insanity for longer periods of time is a blessing my words lack the ability to adequately describe or represent. Ketamine. Thank you Ketamine for the free time.

Ketamine.

I have been advocating for Ketamine therapy for over nine months now. It has been incredible to witness the changes. I made it my mission to put together a Ketamine Provider & Location list. I consistently update my directory when I discover new clinics or offices. I want anyone suffering and interested in trying Ketamine Therapy to be able to locate a provider in their area. I have accumulated a list of over one hundred facilities nationwide. This is not nearly enough centers to reach all those individuals suffering with TRD and chronic pain. I admit I get pretty exhilarated every time I locate a new clinic, or I see a new email from a Ketamine provider in my inbox. It is a positive. I feel that more clinics means that the number of people suffering from Treatment Resistant Depression may decrease. Another possibility is that with every new Ketamine provider, the probability increases that prices will drop and thus make it more affordable, leading once again to the chance that Ketamine could assist and offer hope to those, like me, that no longer believe in the magic of life. We need more Ketamine providers. I have received several emails from healthcare professionals asking me how they can begin offering Ketamine. I had a few ideas and suggestions but felt it wasn’t informative or just never enough to make a difference. There is definitely a need for a program or something to educate on Ketamine and also assist practitioners in becoming Ketamine providers and even more appealing is that you can now be your own boss and a small business owner.

I was not the only person that saw a need to help educate interested health care providers on Ketamine therapy and the possibility of becoming a Ketamine Clinic owner. A few weeks back the owner of The Injection and Infusion Clinic of ABQ, Jason Duprat, informed me of his new Ketamine venture. It has been a challenge for me not to spread the word about this upcoming online Ketamine provider course before the site went live!

I recently spent a couple hours conversing with the founder of The Ketamine Academy, Mr. Duprat. I asked him an array of questions, probably more than he expected to answer in my phone call to him. I asked a slew of questions in order to compile as much information as I could to help interested parties understand better why this online training program is one of a kind. I highly recommend it.

The following is a standard Q & A format based entirely from my personal interview and the notes I jotted down during my phone interview last week. I would love to make an eloquent transition from these few sentences acting as an introduction straight into my dialogue:

What is the Ketamine Academy?

The Ketamine Academy is a training program designed to help educate and coach practitioners on becoming Ketamine providers. It teaches you the step by step process of becoming a Ketamine provider and small business owner, starting with day one deciding to open a Ketamine clinic straight through to the opening day of your new office. This program is high on the business side. It puts all the time consuming searches for procedures and regulations in one location. I could have easily had my clinic doors opened at least 3 or 4 months prior to my actual grand opening if the Ketamine Academy was available to me.

Why did you decide to put a Ketamine provider training course together?

I had been receiving regular emails asking me how I became a Ketamine provider. There was a huge demand from practitioners. I had people reaching out to me through Facebook asking similar questions. I noticed a theme. I recognized that the growing interest in Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression is fascinating and promising. I didn’t have enough time to answer all the inquiries. I researched the internet and discovered there wasn’t an online training course aimed at helping coach interested parties in opening a Ketamine clinic, or a program for health care professionals to incorporate Ketamine into their current practice.

What do you hope to people will take away from The Ketamine Academy course?

I want every student to walk away feeling confident. I want them to learn everything necessary to run a profitable Ketamine clinic. It is my hope that I can assist in helping them overcome limiting beliefs. We can get stuck in our fears. It is often difficult to see ourselves as a boss or business owner. I struggled with taking a risk. I read a lot of business books and motivational books from authors like Tony Robbins. It took time to look past my own mental hang ups and fears. I would like to offer guidance, and we discuss this topic in the course too, because it is important for new business prospects to realize how common fears and doubts about our own ability can influence your approach to your business.

Will there be homework or exercises?

No. No homework.

Will this course walk me through the process of becoming a provider?

Yes. It will provide a step by step systematic approach to becoming a Ketamine provider with options for additional hands on clinical rotation training.

What do you feel was your biggest challenge in opening the Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque?

Hmmmmm. I guess I would say getting my DEA number for a controlled substance. It took months. It was definitely a timing element, and it would have been incredibly helpful to know to start this process before I did.

I would also add that my own limiting belief system was difficult to work past, and I share what I found helpful in moving away from the fear and doubt.

How did you overcome those challenges?

I spent a lot of time researching and reading. My investigations were exhausting. I would go to bed at night having more questions that needed answering the next day. I was also working full time so it got pretty challenging. The more I learned and worked through my fear of failure, the better able I was to get my business operational. Time. That is how. I am hoping that The Ketamine Academy will simplify the process making it more manageable and having far less costly complications and delays. I address the obstacles I faced and made sure my students would not face the same pitfalls I did.

How much does the Ketamine course cost?

The Ketamine Academy’s enrollment for the Ketamine Infusion Therapy training can be explained in a couple of ways. We have two payment options. If you would like to pay in full the cost to you would be a one time charge of $2,499.00. We also have a payment plan. You can pay in three installments of $966.00 for a total of around $2,900.00. We may have possible discounts or specials available so be sure to visit The Ketamine Academy for details or email me at jason@ketamineacademy.com

How long does the training course take to complete?

The average person working a full time job while enrolled in the Ketamine program can look to invest five or six months of their time. This completion time can vary depending on how motivated you are and how flexible your schedule is. The more time you can dedicate to the training course the speedier the return on your investment. There will be well over 5 hours of content uploaded to the site by December 1, 2017.

What types of pitfalls in starting up your own business do you feel this course will help others avoid?

I would say I have a lot to offer from the mistakes I made. I can help students find and read their state regulations and licensing laws. I can direct practitioners away from unnecessary forms that are costly and create delays that could affect your opening date, thus potentially costing you more and possibly bringing an abrupt halt to your opening.

I also feel I have a lot to offer in marketing knowledge. I know what types of marketing have worked for me, and I share those methods with those enrolled in the course. I have learned, and can cover in depth, website design and I plan to help students understand how Search Engine Optimization (SEO) can work for their website and clinic.

Why would anybody be interested in becoming a Ketamine provider?

Well, I feel there are a variety of reasons why this may be a great opportunity for a practitioner. It is a great way to gain control of your career. The possibility of no longer working in a hospital environment with the long, grueling shifts is very attractive. It is an intriguing way to make a living. I find it extremely rewarding. I am working for the people but I am also building a company I am proud of,  provides a huge service to those suffering with Treatment Resistant Depression, and  I am self employed.  I am investing in myself and my clinic. I think that more practitioners will find the idea of being independent appealing and will be willing to take a risk on themselves. The Ketamine provider course will help walk you through the process with our online training program.

What are the advantages of becoming a Ketamine provider?

Personal satisfaction and independence. I also wanted to offer and provide a much needed service to the people in my area, Albuquerque, New Mexico.

In fact, what could be better then assisting a community that have given up hope that their lives could improve? It is incredible to witness the changes that the patients, undergoing Ketamine Infusions, experience.

I have been overwhelmed with the gratitude patients and their families have expressed to me about their treatment, or their loved ones care.

I know for me, I was searching for an opportunity for more independence. I was finding myself frustrated and discouraged with the long hospital shifts. I wanted more freedom.

Are there any disadvantages to having your own Ketamine Clinic?

Sure. Business ownership is a lot of work. In fact, when you first begin the process and then open the doors to your clinic you may actually have to invest more of your time. You might find yourself working more hours than you did at your previous employment. It will be worth the initial time commitment to set up your office to have the freedom to be your own boss.

When I first opened The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, I found I was investing more and more time researching marketing, taxes, payroll, patient care, and web design and optimization. The average person doesn’t have the ability to dedicate hours, days or weeks to learning, making mistakes, correcting said mistakes and trying another approach until they figure it all out.

I wouldn’t necessarily consider this a disadvantage, but more like a learning experience. During the process of becoming a Ketamine provider I discovered the need for an accountant. I don’t think everyone needs one, but they should definitely learn more about the principles of accounting. It also helps to know how to negotiate rental fees and contracts, so it might be advisable to seek out an attorney.  The Ketamine course will cover the basic knowledge needed.

These are several of the main reasons I decided to organize and feature a course helping others avoid spending countless hours reading, testing, adjusting, and recalculating.

Why did you become a Ketamine provider?

I had a family member that has had personal experience with depression and have always been intrigued by mental health related fields. When I was introduced to Ketamine for depression I was drawn to learn more. As a Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist (CRNA) I was already providing anesthetics to patients in a hospital setting, and I was pretty familiar with Ketamine as we often use it during many procedures and surgeries. I wanted to understand how Ketamine was helping people suffering with Treatment Resistant Depression. I have been overwhelmed with the gratitude patients and their families have expressed to me about their treatment.

I was already finding myself frustrated and discouraged with the long hospital shifts. I wanted more freedom. I think the idea of being my own boss and having my own private business was very attractive to me.

There are studies being conducted with Ketamine on PTSD, and I find myself interested to learn more about that. I suppose I was drawn to the mental health aspect of the business too.

What information would you have liked to have had when setting up your Ketamine Clinic?

I think the most valuable information, for me, is state laws and regulations. I think what would have been even more helpful for me is knowing where to find the information I needed. The Ketamine Academy will explain where to locate the relevant reading. I would have also liked to have had access to Ketamine protocols. What I mean by that is, it would have greatly benefited me to know how other Ketamine clinics operated. What was their business model? How do they conduct their business? The hands-on element. I would have appreciated having someone walk me through a typical day. One last thing, I think that it also helps to know how a patient responds to Ketamine and what to expect from the treatments from a patient’s perspective. We cover all these aspect in the Ketamine Infusion Therapy course. The program will have pertinent templates of the various forms you will need to open your doors for business. I personally would have loved having the opportunity to join a course explaining all elements of the business including patient care and Ketamine dosing. Oh, and it would have been helpful to know about taxes and setting up an employment Identification card, state financial projections and expenses, and what the ranges were.

Will you travel to new locations to help set up a clinic?

I am open to the idea. It requires more planning, organizing and arranging schedules to work for both individuals involved. Please feel free to contact me at jason@ketamineacademy.com if you have any questions.

Does the Ketamine Academy have different packages to select from during the enrollment process?

No, not really.

At The Ketamine Academy if you pay-in-full it is a reduced price of only $2,499!

There is another method of covering the cost of the course with a payment arrangement of 3 easy payments of 966.00 each.

If an interested person has started the process of becoming a Ketamine provider, but they keep experiencing delays and unexpected costs, could they still find assistance with your program?

Yes. Definitely. Be sure to contact me at jason@ketamineacademy.com to discuss the possibility of a course discount.

Can a person join mid-program if they have begun the paperwork but became discouraged?

Of course. Be sure to contact me at jason@ketamineacademy.com to discuss the possibility of a discount on the enrollment costs. The beauty of this course is all the information is downloaded and available to students. The Ketamine Infusion therapy program is designed to be user friendly. Each student can either start at the beginning and work their way through the course or they have the option to skip around the course information. The training course allows you the freedom to work at your own pace and on your own time schedule. The Ketamine Academy has a free trial for interested people to get a sample of the content.

Would there be any price reduction if the full program isn’t needed?

This is a question best discussed with me. I will approach this issue case by case. I am open and willing to hear you out, but I reserve the right to decline a request. Please feel free to contact me at jason@ketamineacademy.com if you have any questions or concerns.

If I joined the Ketamine Academy, would I be interacting with instructors and other students? 

Yes and no. The Ketamine Academy will have discussion forums by topics for the students and instructor. Also, look for our Facebook page for another avenue of communication. These options are purely voluntary and not necessary to complete the training program. Sharing can help answer your questions in a timely manner. Communicating by email or the phone definitely works too. Students will have open access to the instructor.

Is the Ketamine Academy an online course only?

Yes and No. The Ketamine Infusion Therapy Training program is primarily an online course with options for hands-on training. On December 1, 2017 students will find that 100% of the course content has been uploaded in order and totally accessible 24/7. The clinical rotations will begin in January, so make sure you enroll early and reserve your place now. Practitioners that enroll early, before 12/1/2017, will have an extended period of 90 days to assess to the course material.

Why is there a need for a Ketamine provider training course?

There is high demand for a program or teaching course to help healthcare professionals establish a safe low cost Ketamine clinic to help administer this new therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression, I know we both have researched programs that coach interested, qualified health care practitioners to become Ketamine providers. The options are limited and costly. I am aware that one doctor asked interested parties to submit a lengthy request and must be accepted into their training program. I located only two facilities offering to assist you in set-up. They are expensive.  It will cost you close to 10,000 dollars to accept their help setting up your own center. You may also find yourself in a situation where you are continuing to pay a long term cost of 40% of your future revenue. At The Ketamine Academy if you pay-in-full it is a reduced price of only $2,499! The website also has another method of covering the cost of the course with the payment option of 3 easy payments of 966.00 each. As a business start-up, the cost and the luxury of working for yourself providing a life saving therapy, the cost is manageable.

I will note here that The Ketamine Academy is offering a free trial, so why not give this opportunity some consideration? It is realistic for many of you. Bet on yourself.

Join me next week for the conclusion of my Interview with the creator of The Ketamine Academy, Jason Duprat. Until then keep, please, keep educating yourself and others on the importance of Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression. You could be offering hope to a person that has stop believing in its possibilities.

Feel free to visit The Ketamine Academy to enroll in your dream today. If you are fascinated, but not yet ready to commit, I recommend the free trial to help you determine whether you want to invest in yourself and in this is new online ketamine infusion training course.

If you are interested in educating yourself on Ketamine therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression check out the four part series I wrote answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years, for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions. In part two of the series, Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression  I addressed questions and concerns about Intramuscular Ketamine verses Ketamine Infusion therapy. In my third blog, Frequently Asked Questions: Redefining Depression With The Assistance Of Ketamine Therapy, I was a bit more random. I had emails with several questions and themes and I addressed as many inquiries as I could.  In my final question and answer dialogue, Pondering Concerns & Questions: The Benefits Of Ketamine For Treatment Resistant Depression, I discussed research, clinical studies, and the need for changes to occur within our insurance companies and federal government so that maybe one day Ketamine will not be so difficult to afford or obtain from any qualified professional. I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why enrolling in The Ketamine Academy’s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

I want to know, are you seeking a new opportunity and the personal freedom business ownership offers you? If so, head over to The Ketamine Academy and get a jump on early enrollment specials.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I also suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. Again, it doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

I have been generating a Ketamine Providers and Locations list and I update it regularly. The provider list can be found here and on my personal website. This list may help you find a clinic in your city or state.

Just think, if you enrolled in The Ketamine Academy your new clinic could easily be added to my directory for the grand opening!

Originally posted on The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

Introducing The Ketamine Academy: An Online Ketamine Provider Training Course

Introducing The Ketamine Academy: An Online Ketamine Provider Training Course

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Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

As a brief summary, I write about my experiences and journey with Ketamine Therapy on my website, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, as well as, The Boise Ketamine Clinic. I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders. My personal mental health care resume includes numerous failed medication cocktails, ECT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Talk Therapy and hospitalizations. I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they never did for me. It was a little over two and half years ago that I was introduced to Ketamine for depression. I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

I wrote a four part series answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years, for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions. In part two of the series, Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression  I addressed questions and concerns about Intramuscular Ketamine verses Ketamine Infusion therapy. In my third blog, Frequently Asked Questions: Redefining Depression With The Assistance Of Ketamine Therapy, I was a bit more random. I had emails with several questions and themes and I addressed as many inquiries as I could. In my final question and answer dialogue, Pondering Concerns & Questions: The Benefits Of Ketamine For Treatment Resistant Depression, I discussed research, clinical studies, and the need for changes to occur within our insurance companies and federal government so that maybe one day Ketamine will not be so difficult to afford or obtain from any qualified professional.

In my latest blog for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ I am so incredibly excited to announce, The Ketamine Academy.  The Ketamine Academy is a new online training program to help practitioners learn a step by step, proven method, for becoming a Ketamine provider. I have been wanting to shout of this news for weeks now. I wanted to mention the Q & A blog series I have previously written to help cover Ketamine information I may not addressed in this blog series because of my enthusiasm with the introduction of the Ketamine Infusion Training Course.

I am truly stoked to finally have a perfect response to those of you reaching out to me wanting to know more about Ketamine therapy. I have had so many people email me or seek me out to ask how they can become a Ketamine provider. In the past, I have attempted to help by assisting in introductions or making calls to connect the questions with a person that had experience and was willing to share their time and knowledge. I can honestly say that I never felt like those forced conversations were enough information or an adequate representation of the importance of safe low cost Ketamine centers to me and others suffering, lost, in pain, and hopelessly in the dark.  I wanted to give more. I am driven to advocate. I want to educate. There is definitely a need.

It was discouraging and often frustrating trying multiple times to get two busy professionals on a conference call together in order for their inquiries to get answered correctly. I have been researching and putting together a Ketamine Provider & Location list for close to a year now hoping to help those suffering with Treatment Resistant Depression find hope. That is what Ketamine offered and continues to give me; hope.  I am not the only person that saw a huge need for an online program to educate and assist people in becoming a knowledgeable Ketamine Provider.

I have devoted my full attention and the next three blog posts exclusively to explaining what The Ketamine Academy is and why I am thrilled by the prospect of an online training course dedicated to helping qualified individuals build their own unique business and assist in growing the number of safe locations available nationwide to provide Ketamine therapy to those suffering with treatment resistant illnesses. Ketamine has shown such positive results in minimizing the symptoms of depression as well as several neuropathic pain conditions. I find comfort and relief routinely with Intramuscular Ketamine shots and I don’t see that changing. I strive to make Ketamine a well known drug for treatment resistant depression in hopes of bringing one more tortured being into the light where they can find moments of symptom free living.

In this first of a three part series I will introduce you to The Ketamine Academy.  I will review what fabulous content and benefits you could obtain by enrolling in the Ketamine Infusion course. This Ketamine Infusion training course is being offered to all qualified Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetists (CRNA), nurse practitioners (NP), physician assistants (PA) and physicians alike. I am ecstatic be writing on such a wonderful and potentially helpful training course.

Be sure to join me the next couple weeks for part two and three of this blog series where I share my interview with, Jason Duprat, the creator of The Ketamine Academy and this much needed online Ketamine Provider Training Program. I spoke in depth with Mr. Duprat and look forward to blogging about our conversation on relevant Ketamine news in a two part informative interview.

The founder and owner of The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, Mr. Jason Duprat, has put together a comprehensive online training course. As the founder of The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, a full time anesthesia provider and course developer, the content included in this course relies upon Jason’s rich academic and clinical experience with Ketamine.

The Ketamine Infusion Therapy Program offered at The Ketamine Academy is a detailed program that combines theory with clinical practice; meaning research meets lessons learned with on-the-job experience. This program includes all major aspects of Ketamine therapy that have practical clinical use and pertinent business value. The teaching approach is derived from Jason Duprat’s clinical experience and the scientific research of Ketamine infusion therapy conducted in clinical trails and research studies. The Ketamine Academy’s  program is one of the only standardized, coordinated and comprehensive training programs in the use of Ketamine.

Once again, this online training program is designed for Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetists (CRNA), nurse practitioners (NP), physicians assistants (PA) and physicians. The program will provide you with tested and proven lessons learned so you can get your clinic up and running in a smooth and hassle free way. There is absolutely no reason now to get caught up in the fear of costly pitfalls. This course will guide you through the entire process, potentially saving you hours in research, stress and doubt. Not to mention the potential of saving thousands of dollars in costly mistakes, you know the ones, those dreaded mistakes that we learn only from heavy challenges and obstacles most of us will run into along the way. I think any start up business has these painful time consuming lessons. However, with the help of The Ketamine Academy’s training course you may be fortunate enough to skip these pricey delays because this program prepares you for what you will need to do to accomplish that end goal of being a business owner, Ketamine provider, your own boss, and a provider of hope.

Mr. Duprat created The Ketamine Academy  to help others, like him, interested in providing low cost Ketamine treatments to other suffering from Treatment Resistant Depression and Chronic Pain. Jason’s ultimate goal with The Ketamine Academy’s training program is ensuring that every student completing the course is competent in their Ketamine knowledge, infusion therapy techniques and is ready to incorporate it into practice. During my recent interview with Jason Duprat about The Ketamine Academy, we spoke in depth about his new training program and website going live. Jason informed me that the Ketamine Infusion Therapy Program is now open for early enrollment for those interested in saving a spot, and I encourage you to sign up.  We need more clinics offering low cost Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression.

During our conversation, which I plan to write extensively on in my next couple blogs, Jason elaborated on why he felt compelled to put this course together and what he hopes qualified practitioners will take away from the program. Jason shared how he wanted more freedom in the work place. The long shifts at the hospital, those hours were starting to take a toll. He has the same dream we all have at some point in our lives and that is to be our own boss.

Jason also eloquently expressed to me that after discovering how Ketamine was helping treatment resistant depression patients from a fellow colleague, he knew what direction he needed to go and started his quest to become a Ketamine provider in New Mexico.

Jason discovered Albuquerque really needed a Ketamine clinic, and because of his education and background, he was in a position to move forward and open his clinic, The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ. With his anesthesia background, Jason has gained extensive experience with Ketamine. He is knowledgeable about all aspects of Ketamine pharmacology and administration. Jason is the sole owner and primary provider for his Ketamine Infusion clinic, which is located in Albuquerque, New Mexico. It was in his Injection and Infusion clinic that Mr. Duprat gained the real world experience needed to become a skillful specialist in the area of opening Ketamine clinics. He also has become an authority on the use of ketamine infusion therapy for mood disorders and chronic pain.

Jason insisted during our interview, and I believe him, that he is planning to be extremely accessible to those that participate in the program. Mr. Duprat assured me that he will help in any way he can as you get your clinic set up and operational. Jason learned a tremendous amount of valuable information during the process of setting up his operation. The training course will surely review unnecessary errors you could make. Jason made his share of mistakes that cost him valuable time and money. We discussed his nemesis by the name; regulations. It is difficult finding the time to research especially if you are working a full time job. It gets even trickier if you are a student trying to complete your MBA.

Time is crucial.

Priceless.

The hours spent locating the correct information can be overwhelming and discouraging to say the least. Jason brings all his experience, the crushing failures and the more positive successes, to the course and shares a step by step process for opening up a Ketamine clinic.

Join me next week for the full interview and an inside look at this amazing Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course.

I asked Mr. Duprat some tough questions during my interview with him about The Ketamine Academy, and I was very impressed with his responses. I sincerely feel that he has put together a complete program.

The instructor will invest extensive amounts of personal attention with each student because Jason wants you to leave the course feeling prepared and confident. This program will provide you everything you need to know in order to develop a successful Ketamine Infusion Therapy Clinic. I will point out that The Ketamine Academy is not just a training program for start-up business owners – this course can also assist those individuals wanting to incorporate Ketamine infusions into their current practice.

I was recently visiting The Ketamine Academy website and read that the course is for practitioners who are interested in entering the exciting world of entrepreneurship. I agree. I think the Ketamine Infusion Therapy Program will guide you step-by-step on how to open your own cash-based clinic. I think it will also give you a valuable education on Ketamine and how this new drug therapy could potentially change or save a life. Ketamine is a game changer.

This training course is necessary, extremely necessary, in my opinion. There is going to be a higher demand for Ketamine centers now that this “old” drug is making the news. People suffering with chronic pain and treatment resistant depression are going to be searching for a facility in their area. Ketamine is a hot topic. Ketamine has made it all the way to TIME magazine.

TIME placed Ketamine on the cover of their August 7th, 2017 issue. It makes a Ketamine advocate like me very happy to see a big publication splashing their covers with HOPE.

Ketamine is finding its way into conversations; more and more every day.

According to The Ketamine Academy website their program could assist you in opening a clinic capable of generating gross revenues of over $1,000,000. The Ketamine Academy provides the only standardized, coordinated and comprehensive training program focused on Ketamine education and creating your very own private Ketamine practice.

Freedom.

You can become your own boss while simultaneously helping offer hope to those, like me, that believe optimism exists only in motivational posters.

I was pleased when Mr. Duprat notified me that he was going to be offering a training course to help Ketamine provider get established. I was over the moon. I have a strong motivation to get more low cost Ketamine centers opened. Ketamine, this drug works and more individuals need access to it. It offers me color in my life again.

I have written on how I feel Ketamine surrounds me in a colorful warmth and drapes me in refreshing bright light and soothes me. I had a recent Ketamine session that crystallized how important color is to me and inspired my last piece, Pulling Back The Darkness With The Use Of Ketamine Therapy. I feel color. I have lived in darkness my entire life. Decade after decade. I wasn’t clueless. I knew I was missing the passion and love I now have for vibrant colors. Ketamine is colorful Hope. The Ketamine Academy might just make it possible for more health professionals to risk thinking outside the box and becoming their own boss. The course provides more than just education. It also has built in support. Fear can keep us all frozen and stuck in place. It is our own limitations that keep us back. We are capable.

Our doubts undermine us.

Another outstanding point to mention is how The Ketamine Academy addresses the hiccups in our own expectations and how that influences the success of any of our life endeavors, and specifically how it directly relates to becoming a Ketamine provider and small business owner.

The Ketamine Academy offers the most flexible Ketamine training program in the nation. You can access the course information online at any time. The course information is available to you 24/7.

I noticed when I was reviewing the training program on The Ketamine Academy website for enrollment options, they state in the course description that their online didactic component will be a self-study course to be completed prior to initiating clinical training. The online component is asynchronous and can be completed at your leisure. They will also work to accommodate a clinical training experience that fits any busy schedule. Therefore, the clinical experience rotations will be available on an as-needed basis. The flexibility is definitely very attractive to the insomniac in me. It makes me want to add another positive in my review of the course. I am seeing a pattern on my pro/con list. I have yet to detect a negative to enrolling in the Ketamine Academy. I am a born worrier and negativity surrounds us all. I immediately scan the website for the cost. That is where I am sure I will find fault.

I have researched programs that assist interested qualified health care practitioners become Ketamine providers and the options are limited and costly. I located two facilities offering to assist you in set up. It is expensive. I think it is out of this world expensive. The short term cost would keep me away. It cost close to 10,000 dollars to accept help setting up your own center. You may also find yourself in a situation where you are continuing to pay a long term cost of 40% of your future revenue. At The Ketamine Academy if you pay-in-full it is a reduced price of only $2,499! The website also has another method of covering the cost of the course with the payment option of 3 easy payments of 966.00 each. I feel as a business start up cost and the luxury of working for yourself providing a life saving therapy the cost is manageable. I will note here that The Ketamine Academy is offering a free trial, so why not give this opportunity some consideration? It is realistic for many of you. Bet on yourself.

The Ketamine Academy has potential to change your life. It will change the many lives of the Ketamine Infusion recipients and their family and friends.

The Ketamine Infusion Training Program is Doable. You will have the support you need from the moment you enroll straight through to opening day.

Exciting.

Join me next week when I share my part one of my Interview with the creator of The Ketamine Academy, Jason Duprat. Until then keep please keep educating yourself and others on the importance of Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression.

Feel free to visit The Ketamine Academy to enroll in your dream today. If you are fascinated, but not yet ready to commit, I recommend the free trial to help you determine whether you want to invest in yourself and in this is new online Ketamine infusion training course.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I also suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. Again, it doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

I have been generating a Ketamine Providers and Locations list and I update it regularly. The provider list can be found here and on my personal website. This list may help you find a clinic in your city or state.

Originally posted on The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

Every Treatment Plan Has Frustrations; Even Ketamine Therapy

Every Treatment Plan Has Frustrations; Even Ketamine Therapy

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Hello again. This is Susan from myketaminestory.com. I am a blogger that suffers with Treatment Resistant Depression (TRD), Anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I was introduced to Ketamine for TRD in January 2015. I am forever grateful that I was. I spent the first two years focused on my recovery. I now have an excellent treatment plan in place but that does not clear me from obstacles or pitfalls. I journal regularly. I educate and advocate for Ketamine Therapy to help treat depression. I write for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, entirely based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years,

It has been a rough couple weeks for me. It makes me humble. I often forget where I once was. I was speaking with a friend recently about how frustrating my recovery has been and how it continues to really mess with me emotionally. I feel so incredible when Ketamine is assisting me. I complained how inconsistent the relief is. I moaned about how the depression was crushing me. I begged her to remind me why I fight so hard. I requested kind, gentle reasons why she thinks that I am a good person. I needed to know my worth. I get discouraged easily. I know much of my insecurities are tied to decades of profound depression and habit energy. I am aware. My friend says to me, “Susan, write.” That was her advice to me after her compliments just caused me embarrassment. It is not easy for me to hear positive insights people see. It is not my strongest ability. It feels impossible to hear and accept kind words about myself when the depression filters are on. I want desperately to know why my friends and family are pleased to have me in their lives. I am eager. When others share with me all the good they see in me I want to reject it even when I need the words and feelings to wrap around me and squeeze tight.

My friend is wise.

Several of the people in my life know what writing means to me. They know how writing has been the foundation to my recovery. It has been one thing I could count on to help me process my feelings and confusion. I have been using my love for language and arts forever to express myself and find clarity. When I responded this way in the conversation with my dear friend, I could hear a smile in her voice as she agreed and pointed out how writing about my black days could also help others understand the journey I am on with Ketamine and perhaps be an inspiration for them.

I was ready to hang up the phone and head straight to my laptop when the last thing she said to me really hit home. I wanted to cry. Her message to me was that I am more than my depression. My friend ended with,  “Susan, sometimes you gotta walk under the hurdles when you can’t jump over them!”

She is absolutely right.

However, I can believe it to be true and logically know it to be fact, but it doesn’t make it any easier to accept it. I do not feel it enough to believe it to be my reality. I don’t want to be outraged by my lack of acceptance. It has been four decades and I am still in denial about not having any control over my illnesses. Ketamine allows me the ability to observe my mind and actions. I can see the difference. I have discovered that the Ketamine works beautifully for me until it doesn’t. I want to be like every other person and not need medication to make sense of the world around me. I resent everything mental health. I pout. I retreat. I fume. I want the Ketamine to never stop working. I don’t want to have any days where I experience a backslide into that all too familiar place. I don’t want to accept this. I want to stop taking any steps back. I falter and the anxiety consumes me. I fear leaving the house. I don’t get it. I was just fine a few minutes ago and now I am fighting to take a breath.

I do have to be told routinely that before Ketamine I never had a symptom free day. The Ketamine shot I get can last up to 12 days for me. It has. I feel if I am eating a vegan diet I find the Ketamine seems to keep the demons at bay longer. I am a vegetarian that strives to be vegan. I have committed to veganism for as long as nine to ten months at a time. Then, in a moment of weakness, I will start to think that cheese and crackers sure do sound amazing! That is all it takes. Dairy foods can be addictive. My body craves cottage cheese. Seriously. Unfortunately, I have become all too aware of how my eating plays havoc on my mood and on how long and how well the Ketamine works for me. I am now re-committed to a vegan diet and plan to write an article on the subject of diet and Ketamine later in the month.

I recognize that many foods cause inflammation. I believe inflammation is directly linked to depression and anxiety. Ketamine works on inflammation. The connection seems obvious. I find when the depression is doing the talking, I want comfort. I am not thinking at my best. I feel miserable and cheated. If I am kidding myself and in denial about the connection between food and feeling good my cravings for a pint of Cherry Garcia outweighs all my memories of past negative experiences. I find myself with a spoon in hand. I pay a high price for those brief glances at pleasure. That sugar will destroy me for days, and what is even worse is the Ketamine is weakening, and the battle is on.

I should be able to control what I eat so I can give myself better chances for feeling great, but habits are locked in place. Great – now I have even more work to do.

Acceptance.

This illness, my nemesis depression, I don’t want to accept it. I don’t want to admit it has control. I am a huge control freak. I don’t want to accept all the issues having treatment resistant depression carries with it. I wasn’t given a choice. This is my history and future. I am beginning to learn to manage the roller coaster I feel I live on most days with the help of Ketamine therapy, but I won’t lie and state I am a master at it. I am gifted with days where I feel like a super hero and I can conquer everything evil. I was never so blessed in the past. I promise not to digress and follow that thought any farther, because I could ramble paragraph after paragraph on how nothing helped me in the past. I could state with hostility that not one medication cocktail or ECT treatment healed my depression enough to give even the slightest relief. Ketamine has been the exception.

I was able to keep that brief. Remarkable.

Back to the conversation I was having with a close friend. I whined to her about my frustrations with feeling great and sinking without a caution sign to warn me. I am exhausted. I am cycling with insomnia. I feel my thoughts never give me peace.  I feel I spend all my waking hours breaking old habits and thoughts. I am not kidding I do spend a fair amount of time working on understanding my illness and how it controls me. I spend even more time utilizing the cognitive behavior therapy tools I already paid for. I am discovering. I am aware. I have learned so much about the differences in my abilities to function in the world when the depression shows its fangs. It is bittersweet, really. I have no control. None. It is like quicksand pulling on me. I am going about my business. I am living life in the light. I am whistling and skipping down the street. I stop in front of a pet store and soak up the glories of the puppies in the window. I feel the sun on my face and life is good. It is really great. I am managing. I feel whole. I giggle at the silliness of the young dogs and then catch a glimpse of myself in the reflection in the store window and it can happen, just like that: sadness and despair. The concrete below my feet turns to water and I am drowning. What the….. Wait. What? Why? What did I do? I promise not to do it again just please allow me another couple days of sunshine and blessings. Just like that I can no longer find the patience I need to deal with Susan when the depression and anxiety take over. I find that I am fighting for the simplest things. Should I go into the pet store, watch from outside, continue walking down the street, or should I, should I? It seems impossible to hear the answers through all the doubts and self hate. It is difficult to hold on to the self assurance I had only moments ago. I want to die. I don’t want to fight. I want to be raging mad that once again I am below the surface. I am frustrated that as much as I want to be able to face the world and its complications, I am reminded that I will always have depression and anxiety filtering my mind and my world.

I was feeling extremely suicidal last week. I was exhausted. I was bitter and resented once again about having to do the constant work needed to keep me grounded and focused. I spend countless hours practicing mindfulness techniques, cognitive tools such as visualization, active thought redirection and behavior modification experiences. Why do I still find myself repeatedly saying I want to die? I wish this would end, I am exhausted, I need a break, stop, please stop? The depression returns. It pains me. I try not to be outraged. I actively plan for the return of my symptoms. It happens. The depression and anxiety return like clock work. I get my Ketamine treatments and I know that I will be more than capable of coping with any stress put in my way. I leave my doctors office 95% of the time ready to take on the world. I am ready to put my illness on the back burner and start cooking. I find myself calm and excited to be participating in this game called life. I am eager to accomplish as much as I can in the next seven or eight days. It is only now as I am writing this blog for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, that it occurs to me that I might be setting myself up to fail my second week during the two week period between my Intramuscular (IM) Ketamine shots and the next maintenance dose. It seems obvious that trying to schedule two weeks of activities and recovery work into the one week I know I will feel great may not be in my best interest. However, I worry that if I spread all my obligations over the full two weeks, I will not be able to manage what I planned in my second week. I want to get everything I can taken care of during the frame of time I have absolute confidence the Ketamine will keep my depression at bay. The second week is far less reliable. As I have written before, the Ketamine has turned down the symptoms I have felt all my life due to depression and anxiety disorders regularly. I have been successful in going almost 12 days feeling free from the beast and darkness. I have also had occasions where the illness took back control after only four days of relief. It is frustrating.  I now see the same adorable puppies in a completely obscure light. I can only hear the barking and clawing. I can smell wet pet hair. I cringe. I feel lost. I don’t want to lose hope too.

I really want to not feel rage and bitterness when the spinning begins. I want control. The anxiety and heaviness is too much. It feels unbearable. My son likes to reassure me that I have been further down the rabbit hole and climbed my way up, I can make it two days until my next Ketamine treatment. He is also correct. I know these confusing thoughts and resentments don’t compare to hiding away from life in a closet afraid of myself and the world outside those four walls. In retrospect I would much rather stress over my indecision and thoughts of doom. Trust me. Unfortunately, when the Ketamine goes on vacation, so to speak, that major drop from “all is good with my world” to the opposite feelings of… “oh hell no, not again. It is too soon. Last time I got relief from my symptoms for nine days and today is day six. Please.” I know that once the devil shows his bloody face it is down hill until my next Ketamine appointment.

I want balance.

I want to adjust more smoothly. I don’t want the presence of my depression and anxiety to be so incredibly disruptive to me and my life. I am trying to have a career and social life. I can’t keep retreating into hiding and misery every 9 or 10 days. It feels impossible to understand how I can cope miraculously with the stresses of work, family and more, only to find myself spinning and unable to find the strength to combat the darkness and sorrow the following day. It is painful. It is exhausting work. There is suffering. Every single being has their own war. I get that. I am not comparing. I am sharing. I am better. I still fight. I still get severely depressed; suicidal. I want to give up. I am exhausted. I direct my focus on trying to make it to my next Ketamine treatment and stay present. It is way too easy to lock myself in my home until I can be the best version of me. The acceptable me. As you can correctly surmise, I am a work in progress. I am all too happy to report that I am moving forward, healing, growing, getting stronger. Every day I gain self awareness, worldly knowledge, and strive to be a better healthier me. I succeed with this task more days than not. I love having hope for my future now. I know Ketamine is not a cure for my depression, but it offers me days filled with laughter like I could never imagine before. It seemed that world was for others. I am glad I can be a visitor now. One day an outcast and the next day a queen. It is the inconsistencies that hit me harder than I care to admit. I still wouldn’t exchange the freedom I have now, even if it doesn’t last more than a week. It is a week I never had before I found Ketamine.

I am very fortunate to have the option of Ketamine therapy and that it works for me. This will not be the case for everyone. I understand that. I also think it is important to know that life is difficult. Everyone has “bad” days. I often confuse a bad day with the start of a depression cycle. This is not necessarily the case. I have had a crap day and would believe 100% that the depression would definitely kill me only to wake up the following day and feel fine.

Emotions are complex.

I try to be curious. I work at refraining from judging myself too critically. I win some, and I lose many. What is important for me to remember is, I am winning.

Winning.

So, yes Ketamine is changing my life. I find I desire life more than death. That has been new. Ketamine religiously lifts me from despair. I need Ketamine therapy to tackle my profound depression so I can accomplish the personal growth I need to be whole and maybe one day find peace and acceptance. I look forward to the day I am no longer raging mad about how my mental illness keeps randomly affecting my life so negatively. That will be glorious.

I know that all treatment plans are not perfect. They all need tweaking. They all then need more adjusting. I do feel blessed to have a plan in motion. I love that I am no longer looking for yet another medication to try and have fail. I am always grateful for Ketamine therapy. How do I state this with such passion after all I have shared in this blog? I know in my heart that I just have to make it until my next appointment feeling these intensely negative suicidal thoughts. I went decades thinking this illness would claim my life. Convinced. It almost did. It almost did. I know as upsetting as the return of my symptoms are to me during the second half of the time between Ketamine sessions, I still have it to aid me. I am no longer in an emergency room having a doctor tell me I am toxic from all the medications I am on. Better yet, I won’t have repeat stories about visits to the ER where I had to have a catheter administered because my latest medication cocktail treatment plan had the wonderful side effect of urine retention. I literally could not pee. Really? I don’t miss those days. I still can’t forget them, but I no longer worry that it is my future.

Every treatment plan issued has pitfalls and obstacles to maneuver around. It can be a frustrating recovery while the mind heals, but I am slowly inching forward with the help of Ketamine every two weeks. It still amazes me that one shot given every two weeks can assist me in functioning in a world I could only dream of being a part of just 2.5 years ago.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I also suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. Again, it doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

I have been generating a Ketamine Providers and Locations list and I update it regularly. The list can be found here and on my personal website. This list may help you find a clinic in your city or state.

Join me again later in the month, when I plan to share my thoughts and experiences about how diet affects mood and possibly Ketamine therapy. I want to send out a special thank you to everyone, from my fellow sufferers to those that love us, that continue to connect with me. I appreciate all the interest and inquiries. I really do. Thank you for reaching out. I hope others will find hope with Ketamine. I will continue to advocate Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression and Anxiety Disorders. It continues to work its “magic” for me every two weeks.

Originally posted on The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression

Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression

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Hello. This is Susan from myketaminestory.com. I am once again addressing questions and concerns regarding Ketamine therapies for treating mood disorders and pain. I am writing a four part series answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years, for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ. This is the second post in my Q & A series.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions. It was because of cost and location that I had to search for other options for treatment. Once I realized I was responding positively to Ketamine Infusions, I worried about how I would continue to afford the treatments. I was fortunate enough to discover an interested doctor in my area willing to administer Ketamine with intramuscular shots. I continue to be grateful to Dr. Charles Moseley for providing this medication to me. I fear the idea of drowning in my depression because I can’t afford the cost. I worry compulsively about losing my doctor. What would happen to my recovery if I no longer had a professional willing to administer IM Ketamine shots? What if there isn’t anyone willing to work with me at a price I could manage paying twice a month for this incredible life altering therapy?

Hold that thought.

My husband and I have been considering moving out West for years. I currently live in Virginia. The winter for me is awful. I know those four months may not be horrible to some, but for me it wreaks havoc on me, mentally and physically. This past winter I promised myself that my east coast winter days were numbered. We started researching states like Nevada, New Mexico and Arizona. We looked at the Las Vegas, Nevada area. We examined Albuquerque, New Mexico. We even went back to my birth place of Glendale, Arizona. The problem I constantly reminded my husband about was who would continue to treat me with IM Ketamine shots if we moved? We have to consider tolerating the winter months because I am able to get my Ketamine shots every two weeks at a price that won’t put me into massive debt in six months.  I wish Ketamine therapy was covered by my insurance company. I am aware of several clinics and centers on the West coast now. However, I am realistic. I could never afford switching to a new doctor. We stopped dreaming of moving to a warmer climate. It was while I was updating my Ketamine Provider & Locations list, which is located here and on my personal website, that I found The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ. I was excited to see that this Ketamine clinic had one of the lowest pricing, for Ketamine Infusions. What was even more of an appeal to me was that the owner, Jason Duprat, is a Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist. I was introduced to yet another profession I could approach and educate. It is because of my Ketamine advocacy that this was valuable information for me. What was even more astounding about this Ketamine clinic was the fact that when I spoke with them, I was informed that they are also willing to administer Intramuscular Ketamine shots. The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ even has IM Ketamine shots mentioned on their website. I love that this Albuquerque center is charging one of the lowest prices nationwide for infusions, but more so, they understand the benefits of Ketamine and are willing to offer another delivery method for Ketamine to those that can not repeatedly cover the charge if routine maintenance or booster treatments are needed. I need them. I know without Ketamine therapy I have no chance at the life I see before me now. It might take a while for me to sink but drown I would. I have no doubt.

When I agreed to write for The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ website, I did so knowing that here is one place in the beautiful state of New Mexico I could consider relocating and possibly continue to receive affordable Ketamine treatments. That calms me. I know that I spend hours researching all things related to Ketamine in hope of educating those suffering with mood disorders, as well as professionals, on the hope Ketamine has offered me and could potentially bring others. If more education and awareness is brought to the benefits of Ketamine for depression the chances look great for changes to one day happen. In the meantime, those with treatment resistant depression continue to suffer; waiting.

In this second series of questions I will address the differences between IM Ketamine and Ketamine Infusions. I will answer questions about long term use and my tolerance of Ketamine over the past two plus years. I will tackle difficult questions regarding how Ketamine has improved my life and why I fight to advocate for this unusual form of treatment. I am open to answering a variety of questions so don’t hesitate to contact me or head over to The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ website for assistance.

Now, without anymore ramblings, on to this week’s question and answer format.

Susan, why do you think you are qualified to address the concerns and inquiries people have about Ketamine therapy?

I feel I must add a disclaimer here and say results may vary, but that sounds so tacky.  I feel that many people are still just now discovering Ketamine for Depression. I have been getting Ketamine treatments since March of 2015. I began with 6 Infusions and for the first time in my life I actually responded to a treatment for depression. I have suffered for decades without any relief. I have also had many attempts to end my misery and in hopes of being set free. No medication cocktail or ECT has been able to make a dent in my depression and anxiety symptoms. Nothing. However, with Ketamine I was able to breathe for the first time; a full blissful breath. I am notorious for holding my breath paralyzed by anxiety. I noticed that after my first Infusion of Ketamine I could literally fill my stomach up and release years of pent up emotions in that beautiful breath. That shook me. It was like catching a faint glimpse of hope. I feel that after 2.5 years of continuous improvements with the help of Ketamine I might be able to speak intelligently on the subject and educate. I want to advocate and give hope. I feel I waited over two years before finally coming to my own conclusions about Ketamine. I feel my experience grants me the authority to comment on the research and benefits of this drug called Ketamine.

Why are you getting Intramuscular Ketamine shots instead of Infusions?

I would have to say the main reason is the financial burden ketamine Infusions would cause me and my family. The number of Ketamine Infusion centers in my area is extremely limited too.

How did you hear about Intramuscular Ketamine shots?

I had to travel to New Jersey, in 2015, for my initial six infusions. It was after my second treatment with Dr. Steven Levine that we discussed how I was responding positively to the infusions and what that might mean for me and the future. I was honest with Dr. Levine about my financial struggles and that I lacked the ability to drive 6 or 7 hours for a costly treatment. I cried in fact. I have never experienced relief from my depression and anxiety before being introduced to Ketamine. It amazed and horrified me. I finally found a treatment that could potentially turn my life around and I couldn’t afford to travel and pay for the treatments on a regular basis.

Why would you need Ketamine routinely? I was under the impression that you only need six infusions to get all the benefits Ketamine has to offer?

I can get pretty fired up when discussing all the articles out there making the claims that you only need six infusions to be “cured”. I will try to contain myself and limit my response to this subject. Ketamine lifted the depression temporarily for me. In the beginning, I was only getting a day or two of mild relief from my depression. I was aware more of how it allowed me freedom from the anxiety that had me locked up in my house with agoraphobia. The benefits Ketamine offered for my depression were limited at first. I would need all six infusions to assess how it might help with my depression. I did feel the difference in my mood as each day passed. The farther away the treatments were for me the more intense it felt when the symptoms returned. In the beginning it was extremely difficult to slide back into depression when the Ketamine effect reduced over time. Painful. I was led to believe the depression would not return after the six treatments. I never believed this claim. I didn’t. I figured if Ketamine worked for me then surely I would need to continue to get infusions to have the relief I was striving for. Ketamine was my last option. I had nothing else. There was a part of me that didn’t want the Ketamine to work because how would I cover the cost if it did. I didn’t really expect it to work so I took the risk financially and emotionally; for my family.

It was after my sixth infusion that the depression lifted for several days for me. I had my last infusion on a Friday and felt good until roughly the next Wednesday, I believe. As the week ended and a new week started, the effects from the Ketamine weakened. I wasn’t surprised, but I was discouraged. I knew that I must find a way to have Ketamine administered to me closer to home and at an affordable price. This was my first introduction into advocating Ketamine for depression.

I have spoken to numerous people that want to try Ketamine but can not swing the steep price tag. When I received my six infusions, it cost me over $3,900 for the Ketamine treatments, travel and lodging. That is a fortune to me. I knew this drug was not a realistic long term treatment for me. I wanted to cry out in frustration. I finally found the answer to my incessant search for something to rid me of my symptoms and there was no way I could continue to pay out of pocket for the therapy. Insurance companies, in 2015, did not cover any cost related to Ketamine treatments. It is heartbreaking.

Dr. Levine agreed with me that Ketamine was my answer. I was responding. It was during my stress about finding this drug helpful, and my fear of returning to that horrendous darkness, that I pressed Dr. Levine for another way I could get the assistance I desperately needed. He mentioned that there was a doctor in Virginia willing to administer Ketamine into the muscle by way of a shot instead or an IV. He did inform me that this doctor, Dr. Charles Moseley, contacted him with a lot of interest in learning more about Ketamine for Depression, but didn’t want to invest in an infusion center. Dr. Levine suggested I call Dr. Moseley when I returned home and investigate whether he was still interested in administering Intramuscular Ketamine shots. Dr. Moseley lives one hour away from me, so I was pretty motivated to plead my case to him. And that is exactly what I did.

Do you think Intramuscular Ketamine shots work as well as infusions?

Well, that is a tough question. I do feel IM Ketamine works! Do I think they are better than infusions? I am not sure. I had six infusions total. I have had well over 35 or 40 shots in the past two year or so. I continue to improve and get stronger. IM Ketamine works. Would I be further along in my recovery had I been able to afford the cost of Infusions? Maybe. I have no idea. I do know that I am healing now with the help of IM Ketamine. I never could have continued getting infusions at 450.00 dollars per infusion. This cost is all out of pocket. I am grateful to Dr. Moseley for hearing me out in April 2015. There needs to be more professionals willing to consider administering IM Ketamine for others, like me, struggling with Treatment Resistant Depression.

Do you recommend Intramuscular Ketamine shots?

I do. I highly recommend IM Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression. I especially feel it is an option for those that can’t afford Ketamine Infusions. I would recommend getting six Infusions first, if you have the funds for that. I know many people want to try Ketamine but can not because of the price tag. The need for education is immensely important. As far as I know, there are currently over a hundred Ketamine Clinics now and only a handful, like The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, are offering IM Ketamine shots as an alternative to Infusions.

Could you explain how these two Ketamine delivery methods differ?

I will attempt to explain. Ketamine Infusions use an IV line that allow the Ketamine to slowly, in a timed manner, enter your system. The Intramuscular Ketamine is given in one or two shots and once it is given can not be adjusted or stopped. This seems to be a major concern in the administering of Ketamine for Depression. Often times, I have learned, some providers will take precautions and begin Ketamine therapy at a lower dose than in a clinic giving IV Ketamine. You may then need to build up to the most effective dosage. This was not my experience. I was given the same dose as I was given by IV. I was also given my Ketamine in one shot. I have been able to tolerate this approach but I know several people that prefer to start at a lower dose and often administered in two shots.

Does it feel different during the two treatments?

Yes and no. I feel with the Ketamine Infusions I was much more disconnected from my body. It was more dreamy. I experienced that “out of body” sensation during almost every Ketamine infusion. During an infusion, the thought of getting up and walking around is impossible to me. Whereas, with IM Ketamine, I have been able to get up and walk over to a trash can, let’s say, without incident. I never experienced nausea with my Ketamine Infusions but have been known to vomit during my earlier treatments with Intramuscular Ketamine shots.

You mentioned vomiting during your earlier session of Intramuscular Ketamine treatments and I am curious what you mean. Have the treatments changed over time for you?

Yes. My Ketamine therapy is mild compared to two years ago. I went in last night to get my Ketamine shot and felt only slightly intoxicated. It was mellow. I have built up a tolerance I believe. I am able report that I get the benefits of Ketamine now with very little dissociative effect. I never dislike my treatments, in fact, I would say 97% of the time I enjoy my Ketamine treatments. They can be very insightful and introspective.

I use my Ketamine session with Dr. Moseley for therapy now. I love getting the benefits of Ketamine, such as an uplifted mood, and the mental clarity is a bonus. My thoughts slow down and I process them with determination and focus. I can verbally express to my doctor my feelings. I can make connections between my behaviors and thoughts. I can reflect. I can feel the depression lift. I can openly communication to Dr. Moseley when this takes place. My thoughts are typically more negative and self loathing before treatments. My thoughts race. My anxiety is typically uncomfortable, bordering on unbearable. The inner noise is pure chaos. I will be summarizing the last two weeks, the time in between my appointments, and will literally stop and look Dr. Moseley in the eyes and say out loud, “Hello I am back. I just felt the “shift.”” It feels like I have changed lanes on a highway. I moved out of my own way, and with that awareness, I am excited to begin psychoanalyzing and sorting through the garbage to be tossed. It is pretty incredible really.

What does that “shift” feel like during your Ketamine treatments?

My doctor asked me the same question a couple months back. I found it easy to reply. I smiled at him and said it was like getting a hug from a kind mother welcoming you home after being away too long. It does. It feels like arms squeezing me tight and reassuring me that once again the Ketamine is working its magic and I will be all right. The IM Ketamine shot welcomes Susan home. It calms me. It is like warm water washing over your body and taking the negativity, depression and anxiety downstream. I can once again breathe with an ease I don’t have prior to my shot.

Why are there not more IM Ketamine Providers?

I think the main reason is because there are no clinical studies using Intramuscular Ketamine as the delivery method. They have only researched and evaluated the IV delivery of Ketamine. Education is needed. I know that more professionals are willing to listen and learn. It is a slow process.

What would you suggest to a person suffering with Treatment Resistant Depression who can not afford Ketamine Infusions?

I highly recommend approaching a trusted family doctor, Nurse Practitioner, Psychiatrist, a Physician’s Assistant or a Registered Nurse and educate them on the success of Ketamine for Depression. I would imagine that if you can try Ketamine Infusions (1-6 treatments) first it could be an advantage because you can take your results to a local provider. You would have documentation of its ability to combat depression. That is how I went about it. That will not be a reality for everyone. I realize and understand that. I also know that many professionals will be closed off to the idea of administering Intramuscular Ketamine. That saddens me. However, I strongly encourage approaching as many as it takes until one individual is willing to work and learn with you.

What if you are suffering so deeply that you can not confront doctors and nurses about the benefits of Ketamine for depression? 

I was in no way capable of advocating for myself during my darkest times. I understand the frustration of trying to get your needs met. I was fortunate enough to have a loving husband willing to do the work I was unable to do. If you have a significant other in your life, or a concerned friend, ask them to accompany you to the office visits.

Oh, and another option is to ask for a prescription for nasal Ketamine. It will need to be filled at a compounding pharmacy and not your standard CVS or Walgreen. I just googled my area for a list of the closest compounding pharmacy and called them. I just asked if they make nasal Ketamine. When you locate a facility that will fill the prescription, make a note of the name and number and take it with you to your office visit.

Do you use nasal Ketamine?

I do; on occasion. I have a bottle I use if I am struggling between my Ketamine shots. I consistently make it 8 or 9 days feeling symptom free. However, I am aware of how the depression filters my world and when the “noise” returns I am reassured that I won’t have to remain in this nightmare until my next appointment. I think of nasal Ketamine as my band-aid. It gives me that added shield against my depression, so to speak. I am extremely blessed to be able to get IM Ketamine shots but if I couldn’t, I appreciate knowing I could get some relief from a prescription nasal spray.

How expensive is the nasal ketamine spray?

It is more affordable than Ketamine Infusions and Intramuscular shots. I get mine for 65.00 a bottle but know of several people shelling out close to 125.00. Do your research is all I can say.

You are right, 65.00 dollars seems pretty reasonable. Why do you continue to get Ketamine shots when you can spend $65-125 a month instead?

In all honesty I don’t care for the delivery method. It is a personal preference. I have suffered with extreme allergies all my life and my nose is continuously affected by my sinus issues. It makes using a nasal spray frustrating and inconsistent because of the swelling I experience routinely in my nasal cavity. I do know of a couple people using the nasal Ketamine spray exclusively, and they are doing fairly well. Two of the people I have been in touch with have never had an infusion or injection and are speaking positively about their experience with nasal Ketamine. I think that is very exciting news.

In closing today I would like to ask one more question. How much do your Intramuscular Ketamine shots cost you?

I would love to answer that question but part of my agreement with my doctor was to not discuss the term of our relationship. What I mean is, Dr. Moseley wanted to keep his options open. I was his first Ketamine patient and he has learned quite a bit working with me. We are mutually benefiting. I pleaded with him and he was kind enough to accept my proposal. Having said that, I would aim for roughly 150-250 per session. This unfortunately is still a completely out of pocket cost to you and can put a massive strain on your finances. However, I have great success with Ketamine and I am capable of working outside the home once again. I am more productive. I am living. Priceless. Ketamine therapy has been worth the sacrifices my family and I have made to our monthly budget.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I also suggest approaching a local professional. It doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

Join me again later in the month, when I address even more questions about Ketamine Infusions and Intramuscular Ketamine. I will share my thoughts and experiences about the different delivery methods, the effects of Ketamine, Ketamine Advocacy, and concerns over what I have been reading during my research and studies on the drug. I will also be answering more questions about Ketamine that many of you have asked me through email or phone calls. Thank you for reaching out. I continue to advocate… Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression and Anxiety Disorders.

Originally posted on The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ website.

Ketamine: Understanding And Trusting In A New Treatment When Experiencing Possible Pitfall

Ketamine: Understanding And Trusting In A New Treatment When Experiencing Possible Pitfall

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Hello again.  This is Susan from MyKetamineStory.com.  I have given my subject matter a lot of consideration.  I thought I might slowly lead into this sensitive topic but decided I am going to just jump right into deep waters and address an issue I have struggled with once during my last 2.5 years of Ketamine therapy.  I feel I might be able to provide insight to others that may have questions about Ketamine treatments and possible pitfalls.

I was recently watching a video on YouTube that another Ketamine user posted about his most recent treatment experience.  I have enjoyed watching his videos because they are informative and real.   My fellow sufferer, whose name is Jon, typically posts videos praising Ketamine therapy.  I was aware that he has been struggling for many weeks now.  He was actually pretty distressed and it showed in his video.  He had been shaken to the core by the outcome of his last treatment.  Like me, this gentleman has been getting Ketamine therapy to help his treatment resistant depression and has remarkable success, too.  In his case, he has been receiving Ketamine for the last six months or so.  I have been communicating via email with him and his latest Ketamine session has me wanting to address his situation in a blog post of my own.  The reason I want to share his story is because Jon has valid concerns I want to address.

I want to respect my friend’s privacy so I will refrain from posting a direct link to his video blog just now.  I am sure it won’t be too difficult to locate for those interested in knowing more.  There are not too many patients writing or vlogging about Ketamine for depression.

In brief, the topic of the video Jon just posted this week was on how Ketamine failed him during his latest appointment.  The anxiety he feels has made it nearly impossible for him not to feel discouraged.  I will preface this by saying that prior to this recent post Jon has had phenomenal results with Ketamine therapy.  I feel very optimistic that my friend will rebound when he is able to move past his fear.

I believe that when you find Ketamine and respond well to the initial treatments, you may encounter a session that doesn’t feel as powerful as previous Ketamine treatments you’ve had, and flashbacks of all the your previously failed treatment regimens weigh heavily on your mind.  I experienced it.  Doubt begins to swim in and tug at your toes. Doubt is a persistent nag and soon it has pulled you into its vortex. You want to fight back.  You want to kick free and change these damaging thoughts that threaten to consume you.  I pushed back.  I had no choice.  These thoughts want to convince us that we will always be suicidal and profoundly depressed.  When Ketamine takes action you know how ridiculous this train of thinking is.  I know how bogus these thoughts should be, but when it’s time for another treatment of Ketamine they are not at all absurd.

Those of us with treatment resistant depression are extremely familiar with medication failures.  We know what it is like to try to be hopeful and have those dreams dashed by reality.  The reality is that nothing in our past has improved the symptoms, and here is yet another treatment that we can add to our rejects list.

I am here to add a tiny bit of comfort.  I hope.  I feel that if you are responding to Ketamine therapy and getting noticeable relief, your chances of continued success are increased.  You may wonder why I feel I can make a statement as bold as that.  I can because there is no documentation proving otherwise.  I say this with a massive smile on my face.  I will also add a more acceptable reason for those that don’t find me at all amusing.  I feel I can share my findings and insights because of my personal success with Ketamine.  I waited a couple years to make my judgments and feelings about Ketamine public.  I have a history of failed medications and treatments.  A long history.  As of 2015, I have only been using Ketamine to manage my depression.  I have privately documented and observed myself obsessively.  I would not endorse or boast rashly about treatments.  I promise you.  I naturally question and research. When I was introduced to Ketamine there was absolutely no information available online.  In retrospect,  I believe this lack of findings was best for me.  I suffer with OCD and could spend hours researching and comparing myself to others.  I desperately wanted reassurance that I was okay.  I also needed to know what to expect.  If I was having a side effect I wanted to know that I wasn’t the only one.  I needed to know when I should call a doctor.  I would not rest until I was well educated on whatever current treatment my doctors were trying. I will admit to you that I can totally appreciate being oblivious regarding Ketamine.  I stopped looking and focused on my own recovery.  It helped me focus on me and stopped my compulsive comparing.

I do however see the value of knowing what to expect.  I will discuss all aspects of Ketamine therapy in future blogs.  I plan to continue having Ketamine therapy for my treatment resistant depression and don’t see that changing anytime soon.   For now, it does relax me knowing that it has been over two and half years and I am continuing to improve.  I have worked through that doubt monster.  I choose to stay optimistic.

I have written before about my anxieties about not being able to afford infusions.   I have expressed how uncomfortable the thoughts of being engulfed in darkness again, even briefly, can disrupt my world.  It is really no surprise that the depression wants to constantly remind us how it is in charge.  Treatment resistant depression is vicious.  I know in the beginning of my journey with Ketamine that I was terrified to invest all my hope in a medication that was still in clinical studies.

In early 2015, the information available consisted of vague studies and little else.  I spent two years working through all my hang ups with Ketamine while simultaneously getting healthier and healthier.  It is undeniable how much centers like The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ have helped provide Ketamine to the public.  Information is now available. I have spoken to other success stories too.  It has been a pleasure to learn that more people are finding Ketamine and getting relief. We have compared notes and remarkably we all agree Ketamine is like no other treatment we have subjected ourselves to before.

I digress.

I watched Jon’s Ketamine video and couldn’t resist posting a comment.  I usually reach out to a person in a more private avenue, such as an email or phone call.  The last time Jon received Ketamine, it brought up a lot of unresolved issues and feelings. The pain of his memories and thoughts led him to believe and fear that Ketamine was failing him. Trust is difficult to obtain when our histories have demonstrated that nothing can improve the depressive symptoms. It is easy to assume that once again failure has shown its hideous face again.

I was saddened by his Ketamine video.  The painful struggles Jon has been dealing with lately made me want to openly reply.  I thought it was important; just in case someone viewed his video and had a less than ideal experience.  I did follow my public comment to my friend by reaching out through a more personal email.   It was my hope that he might routinely check his email.  I wanted to reassure Jon.  Plus, I am not sure how often he is online.  I thought it might be helpful for him to hear my words.

I want to help others considering Ketamine as well as those in the early stages of treatment.  I live in this world of treatment resistant depression and understand.  I do. It is a complicated world.  The depression filters are strong and incredibly believable. Our mental illness has an ugly default setting.  Depression lies to us over and over again.  It deceives us in very convincing ways.

I highly recommend getting cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to assist the Ketamine.  I recently told my doctor that I felt my recovery needed three things.  The first and most crucial is Ketamine therapy.  Secondly, in conjunction with the Ketamine I need to practice mindful meditation daily.  Lastly, I think we all need a professional to help process these new thoughts and feelings.  Our depression has been lifted.  It is amazing. We are in a honeymoon phase for months.  Ketamine is our hero.  We have nothing to complain about because we are too busy living life symptom free for the first time ever. As with any relationship the romance begins to waiver.  Our expectations of what Ketamine will do for us long term increases. Ketamine taps into your subconscious and mends.  In order to move forward completely the Ketamine may bring up unresolved issues from your past.  It makes you very aware of connections between your thoughts and behaviors.  It allows you to dig deeper and find the root.  Ketamine allows you insights into your psyche.

Ketamine experiences are unpredictable, in my opinion.  Even after two years I couldn’t tell you in absolute terms what my Ketamine treatment will be like during my next session because it is never the same.  The Ketamine flows through your mind like a dream.  Most people can’t control their dreams and Ketamine is very similar.  I routinely crawl into bed and drift off to sleep and I am not concerned at all with what I may dream about during my REM sleep cycle.  I sleep and have random dreams.  There are nights that I have nightmares.  I am pretty sure the action of going to bed didn’t cause my nightmare.  The subconscious uses this opportunity to process information on a deeper level.  Dreaming is often unpredictable and random. We don’t always remember our dreams but we dream all the same.  Ketamine treatments are as close to lucid dreaming as you can get.  It is similar to having a dream while being absolutely awake.  You are aware of your thoughts.  You are an observer of your own mind.  This is both magnificent and unsettling at times.  It is a process.  Ketamine is healing but you still have to do the work required to make concrete changes.

I try hard to go into every treatment with faith and hope.   I like having that deeper understanding and knowledge that Ketamine has worked repeatedly for me in the past and continues to assist me.  I know how hard that is.  I have cried and cried.  And I was so afraid Ketamine would stop working for me.  Ketamine is all I have and if the effects of  this fantastic drug stop working for me, I am screwed. But it has. Ketamine has worked where no other treatments have.

I cringe when people mention undergoing electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) aka “shock therapy”.  I  went through 12 sessions of ECT several years ago.  It was by far the worst thing I ever did to myself, and I would never recommend it.  Instead, when my friend stated he would have to look into ECT, my genuine and gentle reply was, “please don’t give up on Ketamine.  Don’t stop believing in its ability to help.”  It is a process.

Ketamine is a process.  I personally don’t feel the Ketamine failed my friend, but more so that Jon may not have been prepared for the emotions that the Ketamine treatment brought up.

Sharing is very difficult when you are vulnerable.  It is immensely painful at times. Sharing in open forum runs the risk of haters.  It is also challenging to be honest with those in your world; it can be pretty high risk if you make a mistake in judgment.  I am sharing to educate and to help others like me.  I know there aren’t thousands of resources about Ketamine for us to google.  My writings are based on my experience with Ketamine and may be different from yours.  I believe, after communicating with several Ketamine patients, that we are having similar experiences.

I know from experience with Ketamine therapy that it sometimes takes time to process years of suicidal depression.  Depression so profound that leaving your home feels impossible.  It is because of this emotional pain that I have found I confused the treatment process with my depression and anxiety disorders.

I watched the Ketamine video and listened to the words.  I totally believe that Ketamine allows you to have these intense insights, and often these views into our psyche are depressing and extremely painful.  I could relate to the frustrations.  For me, I was terrified that Ketamine would fail.  It was close to two years before I was convinced I found the right treatment.  It took some time for me to stop terrifying myself with thoughts that the depression would return and kill me if Ketamine ever stopped working.  I thought about it a lot.  I believe it would be hard for anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression and undergoing Ketamine therapy with success. Ketamine helps, but we still have to endure the pain and process on the road to getting healthy.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or Talk Therapy are wonderful tools for helping sort through the confusion.  Depression taints everything.

I have had a similar experience with Ketamine therapy once. I felt so doomed.  It was a one time thing and really a breakthrough in disguise.  I have touched on the subject in another post.  I didn’t want to leave my doctor’s office.  I can feel the shift when the Ketamine hits my system.  There was one incident where I thought I did not feel any relief from the returning depression and I freaked out.  I started catastrophizing.  My thoughts latched onto the habitual belief that I will one day end my life because of my depression and lack of successful treatments.  I  circled the drain.  Unlike my friend who has been afraid to return for another treatment out of fear of discovering Ketamine has stopped working, I didn’t want to wait the two weeks to try again.  I didn’t want to waste anymore time obsessing.  I had to put Ketamine to the test.  I had traveled so far away from the permanent state of depression that I refused to accept that Ketamine simply wasn’t going to work anymore.

Ketamine is Hope.  It is my hope.

Ketamine allows clarity, and often times it is extremely difficult to feel this turmoil because my depression has numbed most of my emotions and memories of pain.  I am constantly frustrated with learning all these new emotions and finding the correct descriptive words for what these feelings are.

I usually leave my doctor’s office feeling uplifted, and I admit, when I thought I didn’t get that relief I have grown to expect during my visit I was super angry.  I was crushed.  I was so bloody angry.  I was also scared.  The doubts started ringing between my ears.  I was severely depressed by the idea.

Ketamine works in mysterious ways.  It has been 2.5 years of treatments now, and I often find myself struggling.  I am no longer dealing with the depression but all the baggage left around from trying to cope with chronic depression.  It is life.  We all have obstacles we must conquer to be whole.

I really feel that the Ketamine allowed Jon to process painful events from his time trapped in the arms of depression, and he was unprepared.  I have learned my depression default setting makes suicide seem like a logical solution.  When life hits me with overwhelming feelings, my thoughts automatically return to suicide as the only real solution.  I wasn’t too excited to learn that snippet of evil.  I think once I made this connection, I could exam the bigger picture.  It was probably the worst two week period I have had to endure. The doubt monster is full of passion when we are in a weak moment.  For me,  knowing that Ketamine has given me relief at all, when nothing else has, is powerful!

I am so confident that the next treatment Jon has will give him the relief he is craving and afraid he won’t get.  I am.  I strongly suggested and highly recommended moving his next appointment up.  Jon doesn’t get Ketamine every two weeks like I do.   His treatments are six weeks apart; sometimes longer.  If he is anything like me, he will probably obsess for the next 6 weeks that the Ketamine won’t work.

It is difficult to need Ketamine. It is painful and utterly uncomfortable. I used to worry obsessively about what I would do if Ketamine stopped doing the job I expect, but I am here over 2.5 years later.  I had one experience where the Ketamine didn’t get it right.  I laugh because looking back, I realize it did.  It was a gift wrapped in pain.  It forced me to work harder to figure out why I didn’t respond in the typical way I usually do.  I know that it was exhausting.   I obsessed on all the pain I caused because of my illnesses and only wanted to die.  Life often feels pointless to me.  I feel these are my default settings and the depression is a lying bastard that wants to destroy me.  I worried about it all.

Ketamine gives me clarity.  We may not always be ready for what it shows us.  We have been in darkness so long that the sunlight burns.  I think that the Ketamine was telling Jon that it was time for him to face these painful feelings of regret.

I think Ketamine gives you a crash course in the grief process. It is frightening, but I know I have to process and push through.  Change comes.

The Ketamine will give Jon relief and after his next treatment he will probably kick himself for waiting so long for relief.  The ego and illness want 100% control, and I think it lies to keep that power.

I realize that my Ketamine friend is in a bad place right now and if the only thing he can absorb from my ramblings is to make a sooner appointment I am okay with that. I just don’t want him to continue torturing himself unnecessarily.  Trust me, I do know. Recovery and healing are not linear.  I hope if there are others facing the doubt monster right now that my words will offer comfort and strength to keep striving to get well.

This article was originally posted on The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ