symptoms

March 1 2018

Ketamine: My First Three Years

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Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

I am a blogger that suffers with Treatment Resistant Depression (TRD), Anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I was introduced to Ketamine for TRD in January 2015. I am forever grateful that I was. I spent the first two years focused on my recovery. I now have an excellent treatment plan in place but that does not clear me from obstacles or pitfalls. I journal regularly. I educate and advocate for Ketamine Therapy to help treat depression.

I write for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, entirely based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 3 years.

I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders. My mental health has been my primary focus; often times without my permission. I wanted normacy. I craved it. I believe I always will.

I sometimes feel heavy hearted when I reflect on the numerous failed medication cocktails I tried. The months wasted. The horrendous side effects I then had to recover and heal from, not to be outweighed by the withdrawal symptoms these mixtures often produced. To remember the desperation I felt when I went against family and agreed to ECT treatments. The months spent inside frozen walls. I was locked up for safety in multiple psych wards. I would lose years fighting my way to the surface. I would glimpse the light and warmth of the sun only to be torn and unwillingly dragged back to the underworld.

A vicious cycle of torturous hell.

Exhausted.

Death would be a blessing.

I have painfully expressed myself over the years. I have dissected my life with my toolbox of tricks. I utilized skills I learned through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Talk Therapy, Art Therapy and journaling, just to name a few, and yet I would repeatedly find myself being a prime candidate for hospitalization.

I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they just never did for me.

I was laying in limbo back in January of 2015. My body was fighting to keep me alive while my mind dove straight for freedom. I had given up completely.

I have stated many times before that my husband and son never gave up their search for a way to lift me up and breathe life back into my corpse-like existence.

I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

It has now been three years, as of March 2, 2018, since I was introduced to Ketamine for depression and received my first Ketamine Infusion, and I would love to review, explore and educate myself and others on just how remarkable Ketamine is for me with the hopes of reaching down into the dungeons to pull others into the light and offer them hope.

Ketamine.

It may not be the answer for you, but what if it is?

Ketamine breathes life into my twisted, confusing, angry and hateful view of the world. It promises to dig deep to locate me. Ketamine offers me all I need. It makes the years of accumulating coping techniques and management skills not an utter waste of time and money. I am revisiting all the therapies I subjected myself to with desire to understand why my world was a horror story even Stephen King wouldn’t want to write about. I set out to discover if I started picking up old strategies I was taught but could’t benefit from in the past – because the hideous demons claimed ownership of my thoughts and perceptions – if they may be useful to me now. Remarkably, I have ascertained the true depths in which these past therapies can be of practical and functioning aid to me. I absolutely believe it is because the Ketamine suppresses the depression filters for long enough periods of time to make growth and healing possible.

I am elated.

I want to invite the readers of The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ website, as well as those interested parties that found my Ketamine blog through my personal website or social media, to please join with me in celebrating life.

I am, on most days, gleeful to celebrate three years of life.

Thank you Ketamine.

I thought I would ruminate. Reflect. I might even visit a few more avenues of healing I stumbled upon over the past three years. Things like healing through mindfulness. Centering and breathing and their importance when experiencing daily stress and struggles. I have implemented grounding techniques, and I now have them firmly in place to avoid being completely swept away by the goblins trying to steal my light.

I am always reading, educating and experimenting with my creative mind. I have even added a few tools I constructed on my own. I am learning that there are no right or wrong lessons. I discard the methods that hinder me and hold tight to those precious tools that allow me to redirect and disengage myself from the trolls lingering, patiently waiting, for my self-confidence to waiver or shift. They will attack when I am weak.

I know this.

These trolls, they still find clever ways to taunt me. I find it shocking and anger provoking when I am easily fooled and drawn into their web of deception. I am.

I know their manipulation.

They attack when I am looking and enjoying the vast array of colors and positive energy surrounding me. They will appear in obvious places. They often come silently up behind me and cloud my vision.

These creatures of horror that keep waving to get my attention, or worse, when these lying zombies threaten to suck hope from me, they are unearthing my powers. They have to go up against my throng of cheerleaders.

I have attacked and destroyed the chaotic circus playing their mind bending and convincing songs several times over the past three years. The lyrics affect me differently now. I have discontinued my subscription. I prefer the circus not enter my little town again. They move in close. Set up on the outskirts. I can hear them in the background.

Negative.

Ketamine has allowed me to recognize their voices. It took some time and much patience. I am very low in the department of patience but I strive to find acceptance. I am capable. I have the ability to differentiate. I can often wade past their self loathing comments and hurtful cunning lies. I listen harder for those positive thoughts. I run to the magical voices singing of love, forgiveness, acceptance, healing. They have my attention.

I smile.

The melody is soothing.

Words and questions.

Lesson to be learned.

I am an eager student.

Over the years Ketamine has been a huge asset to me. It aids me time and time again. I have floaters wrapped around my arms and legs keeping me on the surface. Ketamine is my life preserver. I can take these life saving devices off temporarily and put them in the garage for storage.

Ketamine has gifted me with freedom from my illness. It has shined brightly on the demons and I can see them for what they are. What is that, you ask? I see that they are not me!! I know without any uncertainty that I am not my depression.

I felt the difference.

I experience life without the gloom and torturous illusions.

Ketamine graces me with days to learn the subtle shifts. It has taught me where the haters live. It has made it possible to grow and heal.

I want to redecorate.

I see.

I see colors and light.

In the beginning, for decades, my world was just hateful blackness. A broken down palace. My insecurities and fears were cement walls. Decaying. But Ketamine, oh Ketamine. It shines the light on all the colors and possibilities.

My new haven is scorching hot. It is burning reds and oranges. The blues dance around. I can bring silliness and childlike curiosity to the center and rebuild. I will decoupage my house with flowers and uplifting quotes. My walls will be constructed with life. I have a beautiful team rooting for me in the basement. They are screaming words of encouragement. I look at the possibilities. I hear hope.

I am working on orchestrating a stellar sound system so I can amplify these messages of well being and love and have them dominate my palace.

I believe.

I have many sources of light to work by. I continue to question. I observe. I try to be curious. I pay attention to the direction of my thoughts and pull them back from the edge over and over again. I can drag my attention away. Redirect. Reprogram. It is frustrating and painful. It seems I will be practicing forever. Fine tuning.

Practice being happy?

Practice.

Being.

Breathe in the goals and dreams. It may take years to accomplish what my heart and mind desire but with the help of Ketamine and my tenacious attitude, I can rewrite my story.

When I had my first Ketamine Infusion, on March 2, 2015, I was dead inside. I had nothing inside. I remember coming out of treatment not feeling much more than having thoughts that the infusions were very pleasant. As my husband and I were headed back to our hotel, I felt discouraged that the feelings I had during the therapy didn’t spill over. I was silent. I was trying not to judge. I had five more sessions before I would allow my negativity to flood and drown me. I just wanted to go back to bed. It was when my hubby suggested going to a New Jersey Mall near our hotel to make a visit to the Apple store that I had my first glimpse at the maybe.

Maybe.

Maybe something is different.

I held my breath.

Waiting.

An act of pure patience, and I am fully aware of repeatedly failing those exams. I would be consumed with anger.

Waiting without expectation.

Our expectations can truly tamper with our lives.

I am not a fan of malls. I have horrible anxiety. In the past, just the thoughts of shopping and crowds could send me into tears. I was a prisoner of my thinking mind.

My husband asked if maybe it would be worth trying. I waited for the anxiety attack. The panic at his wanting me to attempt such a horrendous task. I expected tears. I paused with interest. This is different. This feels strange.

I turned to Geoffrey and in a hushed voice I exclaimed, “Wow, that is odd! I am having thoughts that would have caused tremendous conflict and panic. The thoughts are still present but my body is not responding. Isn’t that strange?”

That would be the beginning. I went on to do all six infusions with tiny glimpses at what life could be without depression.

I have feared that my depression was self induced. Terrified. Ketamine awarded me with the jackpot. I am not my depression. That is magnificent.

It would take continuing with Ketamine treatments. I get intramuscular Ketamine shots every 7 to 14 days. I struggle. I fall back into that dungeon and I am filled with hate and anger every time it happens. I want to constantly build and progress. Heal.

My goal this year is to work on anger. I have spent the majority of my life suppressing and avoiding anger. I am absolutely aware of its existences and control over my recovery. I am ready. I am strong. I do worry that the depth of my hate will be disastrous if explored.

However, when I sink into gray, and my focus is only on the circus and the craziness they whisper louder and louder in my direction, I believe it is my anger that keeps me tagging along unwillingly at first.

I see.

I continue to explore with interest.

I am not searching for the many, easily found, tapes from the past. If I stumble across one I may be lured if I am feeling weak in mind or spirit and take a listen. I pride myself on being able to toss an old tape aside or replace it with a new track.

I don’t take things at face value. There is always more to a story.

I am a detective.

Ketamine has made me an excellent investigator. I am making connections. What is more amazing is I am making changes. Positive growth. A positive life.

I am hopeful.

Three years ago Ketamine opened my eyes. It offers me insights. It makes it possible to appreciate all the glorious colors. It opens my mind. I know that Ketamine helps me see past the depression. It reminds me that I have an illness but I am not my illness. I have been fortunate to have multiple days without symptoms. It is during these moments where the curtains are pulled back and clarity is present that has allowed me to hear the cheerleaders and tune out the circus. I know I can. I believe in hope, because I was given the opportunity and tools to catch sight of what could be.

I would get Ketamine and plan a full schedule to take advantage of the time I felt great. Only, I would be exhausted from trying to accomplish unrealistic goals in a short time slot.

I would discuss with my doctor.

I write and make notes of my observations. My website and these writings for Jason, at The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ are a sample.

When I am tripping over myself and overflowing with anger because I have to experience any sadness or days of depression, my son gently reminds me how far out of my nightmare I have traveled.

I reflect.

Three years. It went by fast. It went by painfully slow. There has been one very obvious change in the past three years.

I am living.

I sink and get stuck. I don’t always understand why.

I can spin and be out of commision for days or weeks.

I do stop spinning.

I have a solid oak tree with thick, massive branches. It catches my fall. I tumble for what feels like a lifetime but it is an illusion.

My depression surrounds me and begs for me to give up and follow obediently. It yanks on every appendage. It demands my full attention. It promises me freedom. I just need to tag along and enjoy the nature trails. It paints a world without fear and hate. It is sinful how convincing these lies are when the depression is demanding every thought I have and feel.

This false freedom has a cost.

It will cost me my life.

In the three years I have been getting relief from these debilitating symptoms with the help of Ketamine and my creative toolbox, I can honestly state that I do see growth and healing.

I informed my doctor that this year my goal is to tackle anger and make her my bitch! Ha. I am terrified. I am ready.

I can read over my journals and feel the subtle shifts. I want the changes to be dramatic and life altering. I laugh at this. I hate change. I can’t win.

I smile.

I am living. Three years longer than I thought possible. It is my anniversary. It is my birthday.

Ketamine and I will be celebrating on March 2, 2018. I am sure I will revisit the topic and share my insights and discoveries in the coming months. I am on a journey of self discovery.

I stop by my doctors office and reconnect with Ketamine and head out ready to take on the world once again.

I am thrilled to be here today feeling the way I do. I look forward to sharing more anniversaries with Ketamine. I am excited to see what is in store for me.

It has been a lengthy process and I am aware that I have many obstacles ahead of me. I do. I will skip and hop. I will also lose my footing and painfully slide into the abyss. It won’t take me as long to save myself and head into my doctor’s office to get another Ketamine shot.

Ketamine is Hope.

Truly.

I have had freedom without death.

Thank you Ketamine.

It is fantastic to have you in my corner.

I will battle on. I will fight my way to the surface each time knowing I have Ketamine to aid me in my life-long recovery.

If you are interested in educating yourself further on Ketamine therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression, check out the four-part series I wrote answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 3 years, for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

In part two of the series, Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression I addressed questions and concerns about Intramuscular Ketamine verses Ketamine Infusion therapy.

In my third blog, Frequently Asked Questions: Redefining Depression With The Assistance Of Ketamine Therapy, I was a bit more random. I had emails with several questions and themes, and I addressed as many inquiries as I could.

In my final question and answer dialogue, Pondering Concerns & Questions: The Benefits Of Ketamine For Treatment Resistant Depression, I discussed research, clinical studies, and the need for changes to occur within our insurance companies and federal government so that maybe one day Ketamine will not be so difficult to afford or obtain, from any qualified professional.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why Ketamine could help you or someone you love.

Also, if you would like to become a provider of Ketamine Therapy try enrolling in The Ketamine Academy‘s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course; it would be an excellent decision and could be extremely helpful for others like me. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

If you, or someone you know, are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit Jason Duprat’s Ketamine clinic at www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost Ketamine Infusion and injection options.

If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I would also like to suggest that you, or a trusted person in your life, approach a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. Again, it doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

There is definitely more education available for you to make a case for yourself and your mental health.

I have been generating a Ketamine Providers and Locations list and I update it regularly. The provider list can be found here. Please visit my personal website for the full provider list. This list may help you find a clinic in your city or state. I update the provider list regularly. I highly recommend individuals contact me if you administer Ketamine or if you are aware of a Ketamine provider not in my directory; I will happily add new Ketamine clinics.

Feel free to visit The Ketamine Academy to enroll in your dream today. If you are fascinated, but not yet ready to commit, I suggest the free trial to help you determine whether you want to invest in yourself and in this is new online Ketamine Infusion Training Course. Just think, if you enrolled in The Ketamine Academy your new clinic could easily be added to my directory for the grand opening!

Originally posted on The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

February 8 2018

Ketamine Therapy Is NOT A Cure For Treatment Resistant Depression, It Is An Aid

Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

As a brief summary, I write about my experiences and journey with Ketamine Therapy on my personal website, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, and also for The Boise Ketamine Clinic. I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders. My personal mental health care resume includes numerous failed medication cocktails, ECT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Talk Therapy and hospitalizations. I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they never did for me. It was a little over two and half years ago that I was introduced to Ketamine for depression. I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

Once again I am compelled to write about the misconceptions regarding Ketamine being a cure for depression. It has been over the past several weeks that I have received multiple emails on the topic of Ketamine and its usage. What is even worse are the comments I read on the various Ketamine websites and social media sites. There have been angry messages left complaining about how Ketamine has to be administered regularly to work for depression. I don’t know about you, but I can not think of any medication that is a cure for an illness. I just doesn’t happen that way.

In the past, I have been on multiple medications. Medications that had to be taken daily. Medications that often had to be taken a couple times a day. And the side effects! Oh the side effects. Horrible. The relief was absolutely zero. I have found no cocktail or single medication has been a bit of difference for me. I would slide further and further away. Sinking into that seedy abyss. Lost to everyone around me; including myself. I have been hospitalized multiple times to ensure safety. I would work diligently to recover and gain back my life. It would take me years to gain back all I lost during these tragic descents. Only to have the cycle begin all over again. It was exhausting and utterly frustrating to never feel like you are progressing and healing. I never felt in control of my life. I felt I was continually a prisoner of my mind.

I was frequently lost.

Lost.

Every day was a battle for me to stay.

It is painful to view the world around as such a negative and hateful place. A place I couldn’t participate in. I would watch people interacting and experiencing life and jealousy would consume me. Why could I only feel death calling me. Why couldn’t I find joy in anything. I have interests, hobbies, and goals just like my peers. I did. I just couldn’t ever find the desire to exit my bed or house and when I forced myself to engage in life I would end my day defeated and miserable.

It is no life.

A life without color.

A life heavy with regrets and suffering.

I became a great actress over the years. I tried to be optimistic. I did. I fought. I pretended. I wanted to fake it until I could make it through the darkness that threatened me daily. I used every ounce of my sanity to combat the demons trying to convince me that I was a terrible person, unworthy of existing. I lobbied all my resources, all that I was capable of reaching. I have acquired a huge arsenal of weapons against my mental illnesses. I attempted time and time again to gain more ground.

I would build myself a foundation. I would erect walls, thick walls, to keep away the devil insisting on calling my name. My support system would remind me how strong I was. How many, many occasions I have listened to others that loved me ask me to strive with all the passion in me to assault the mental circus clowns that used trickery to persuade me that I was weak. That they would always win.

Lies.

And more lies.

Depression is a lying bastard that has no soul.

However deceitful the message was, I was a believer.

I had more confidence that the beast would succeed, and I would be another suicide statistic.

I didn’t see strength within. I saw a lost little girl crying. Crying for a life she would never be a part of.

Depression kills.

It is a slow methodical death. It was an obsession.

I never felt strong.

I focused on avoidance. I compiled a list longer than Santa’s naughty or nice list on how to escape. They say that Thomas Edison never failed, he just found thousands of ways that didn’t work. He only had to find one way to make a light bulb work. He did. Could I?

In walks Ketamine.

I am now 45 years old.

Decades of failures.

It was almost too late.

Almost.

Ketamine was the one.

I lacked faith.

I had no excess of hope remaining.

I gave up.

My family did not.

I have been treated with Ketamine for close to three years now. I gain.

I am gaining.

Ketamine is a medication that keeps the drudgery at bay.

Can I say that again?

I will.

Ketamine is a medication.

Ketamine is not a cure.

Ketamine aids me.

Ketamine is a band aid. It is over time that the bandage lossens and falls off. A replacement is needed; regularly. That is how a bandaid works, correct? I have never applied one and had it stick indefinitely.

Ketamine relieves the symptoms, making it nearly impossible for the nightmare to consume me. I still have to fight. I still have to search deep within and start the reprogramming. I need and want to hotwire my mind like a car thief. I am desperate to rewire and rebuild. I no longer have use for that beater car. I have my eyes on the luxury sedan. And I just might be closer to that goal than ever before. I long for that 1957 Corvette.

Ketamine, when given to me on a regular basis, frees me. I no longer have a clogged engine. I can see all the wires. I visit all sorts of junkyards from the past. I am picking up piece, by little piece, and rebuilding. I am no longer trying to assemble that first car. You know, that car that was always breaking down but I was stuck with because it was the only one available to me.

Ketamine has given me more options.

I set my goals high.

I want my Corvette. I am building it now. I realize that my dream car can’t be functional until I gain the knowledge on the parts needed to assemble it. Ketamine allows me the freedom to look around for what I need. The shell is constructed. I am fine tuning the inner workings. You know and I know building an automobile takes skill and knowledge. You have to locate all the missing components and gather them together in a logical manner, and in the process become a manufacturer or expert on Corvettes. Ketamine is a tool. It is a guide. It directs me. It pulls back the darkness and I can see all sorts of parts to investigate. Investigate I must. I know little about the intricate ways a car operates. I mean besides inserting a key to start my vehicle. I have learned through my pain the necessity for oil changes and gas, but my ability to perform these simple tasks was limited by the incessant chatter in my head directing me incorrectly. Ketamine has given me the car manual. I am now reading and learning all about my Corvette. The oil stills needs refreshing, but I am now capable of fixing my inaccurate notes. I have hope that one day I can rid myself of that college car that was constantly breaking down and replace it with that shiny new 1957 model.

I have hope.

I will rebuild.

I can rebuild.

I can see all the parts and I am learning their functions. Ketamine suppresses the confusion screaming for my attention. I am able to recognize when my notes get sloppy and the circus begins.

Ketamine time.

I return to the topic at hand. Is Ketamine a cure for Treatment Resistant Depression?

I ask you this question. Do you think when I get my Sting Ray running that it will never need gas?

Ketamine has gifted me with an inner understanding of my Corvette; aka my suicidal depression. It repeatedly aids me when I am in my garage building. It is exhausting work. I am learning a new skill. I am often clouded by my lack of knowledge, my misconceptions and false beliefs. It gets so dark sometimes that I still can’t see my notes. I return to the car dealership for clarification and reassurance. I am so grateful to know the way to the experts. Ketamine is my mechanic. I visit him weekly or biweekly depending on my needs. Ketamine calms me. It gives me hope that one day I will be driving down the highway with the sun above me and the wind briskly blowing through my hair. I am absorbed with the delight of believing in this view of my future.

Ketamine is Hope.

Ketamine is not a cure.

Why is it that people insist on believing their cars don’t need gas? Why is it that in the past they would utilize multiple additives to get moving but now want a super octane fuel injected 6 times so they can hit the freeway at 120 miles an hour? Is that realistic? If in the past you needed refills daily, why believe that now, with Ketamine, you would only require a few visits to the mechanic? Why?

Routine maintenance is needed for every car on the road to function and operate. This is definitely the case if you have been commuting through your life with an unreliable source of transportation. Depression damages the ability to drive. Depression robs you of your keys. You can’t drive a car if you have no way to start the engine.

In my past, I have searched diligently for the manual to my classic Chevy; without success. I would dig deep. I would rummage through the broken parts and try to force them to work, to fit. Only, I was using Ford parts and treatments on my limited edition sports car. It is no wonder why I kept calling new mechanics to help me discover why I could never turn my car over. It would just sputter and die. I would crash and burn in my confusion. The lights in my garage would constantly flicker and fade, leaving me longing for a different car, but my heart has been so set on that red and white beauty. It hurt.

So much time and money wasted.

Failure.

That was until my support team or pit crew discovered a better way for me to repair, operate, and enjoy the process of rebuilding. To believe in that dream that one day I will have my 1957 Corvette to race around the track without incident. I am not a fool. I know that once my car engages and increase speed I am going to need replacement tires and gas. I try to think of Ketamine therapy as my pit stop. It can be frustrating. My ideal car needs special attention. Love. It needs to be treated. Often. There are a variety of cars out on the road today. There are electric cars that need to be charged. Ketamine is my battery. I need to plug into an outlet and recharge. There are cars that are newer and don’t require you to refill them as frequently. They have a huge reservoir to store gas in. They are fortunate. My gas tank is small. It makes demands. I pay attention. I give it the proper fuel and attention. I must do this routinely. I am grateful that I no longer own that beater car. I am blessed to have had help.

I am grateful that Ketamine provides me with the essentials.

Ketamine is my gas.

Ketamine is my battery charger.

I am not delusional. My car needs these elements to function. I am okay with that aspect of ownership. The main reason I push forward with my project is solely due to chucking the defective parts that won’t keep my dream alive. I can do this with the aid of Ketamine. I don’t ask the Ketamine to be more than it is. Fuel to keep my car out of the garage. It can be costly. It can be disappointing to run out of car in a traffic jam. I fight now to keep focused on the long term goals. I succeed. I falter.

I am learning a new skill. Starting from scratch. I have many manuals in my bookcase, but only the one with the name 1957 Corvette keeps me studying the pages and absorbing the details.

I will run out of gas. I get resentful of not being able to predict when my tank will empty. Ketamine can be like driving a car without a gas tank gauge. I get bitter. I expect so much of myself and that manual. I get the facts wrong. I try again. I want to throw in the towel and wash my hands of the dirt and grim but can’t. I know it is temporary. This negativity and desire to surrender to the old messages can be brutal.

I have the correct car manual now. I am rebuilding.

I need Ketamine the same way a car needs gas.

So, once again I ask you, is it realistic to think your car won’t need to stop at a gas station once all the parts are operational? If you have been giving yourself various additives in the form of psychopharmaceuticals without triumph, what makes you believe one product will satisfy and never be needed again?

Ketamine offers the right formula for those that have had no reaction to other forms of treatment. If the traditional therapies failed you and left you stranded, Ketamine may be the medication for you. Please note that you will be required, in most cases, to get maintenance. You are a special type of luxury car and you may be obligated to treat your vehicle with the utmost respect and care. Repeatedly.

I hope this blog will clear up any confusion people have regarding the vague writings out there on Ketamine therapy and its ability to help sufferers live life outside their darkened, frightful cave.

Ketamine is an aid. It is gasoline. It sparks the mind and makes the connection needed to jumpstart your car, but it doesn’t deserve the label, cure. It just doesn’t. It is an injustice to those, like me, suffering with treatment resistant depression. We have been lied to over and over again. I know I have been. I was instructed to take numerous medications and keep track of dosing and side effects. I followed along mindlessly. I would complain or be hospitalized when the medication cocktails failed. I was asked to give these medications more time. Years of stopping and starting the newest treatments available on the market. That was asking too much of me. How do you get a person to believe that in four to six weeks they will get relief? How is it fair to ask a person that has had no reaction to a mixture of drugs to hold on, this medication will do the trick. It will work. And it never has.

The exciting thing about Ketamine is relief is often immediate. It is fast acting.

I believe this is where the confusion begins. It appears to be a miracle after decades of failed therapies. People are responding. Does that mean Ketamine is a cure?

I believe the definition of a cure is as follows:

Cure: something (such as a drug or medical treatment) that stops a disease and makes someone healthy again. It is something that ends a problem or a bad situation. It is the act of making someone healthy again after an illness.

Ketamine improves the symptoms of Treatment Resistant Depression, but in no way has it been my experience that Ketamine stops the disease altogether. It is not a permanent fix. It makes it possible to perceive the world around you in a positive light. It lifts the heaviness of depression. It has allowed me to silence the noise that threatens to annihilate my existence.

I feel that so much more education is still needed where the discussion of Ketamine is involved. This is one reason I continue to share my experiences and discoveries through my writings.

I continue to investigate and gain ground.

Ketamine is my tool. It is my aid. It rarely disappoints in its ability to quiet the voices and bless me with days, many days, of relief. I have not been fortunate to experience this type of independence from my debilitating illnesses with any other treatments. I believe it is a remarkable medication. Medication.

Ketamine is an antidepressant. It is not a cure.

There is definitely a need for celebration. If only more practitioners could administer this phenomenal drug, I believe many sufferers could richly benefit.

One medication that provides a week or more of relief. That has been unheard of in the mental health community. It is very exciting. Promising.

Just try not to expect 100% indefinite relief. You may be disappointed. However, have you ever experienced a major shift in your symptoms from just six pills? Probably not. In many cases, we are on a variety of medications daily with little to no relief from the monster stealing our attention. The horrendous nonstop illusion. Depression speaks only a deceitful language that we believe because it is extremely convincing.

Ketamine offers hope and relief. It doesn’t, in most cases, offer a long term reprieve from mental illnesses.

If you are interested in educating yourself on Ketamine therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression, check out the four-part series I wrote answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years, for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why Ketamine could help you. Also, if you would like to become a provider of Ketamine Therapy try enrolling in The Ketamine Academy’s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course; it is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you, or someone you know, are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit Jason Duprat’s Ketamine clinic at www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I also suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. Again, it doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

I have been generating a Ketamine Providers and Locations list and I update it regularly. The provider list can be found here and on my personal website. This list may help you find a clinic in your city or state.

Feel free to visit The Ketamine Academy to enroll in your dream today. If you are fascinated, but not yet ready to commit, I recommend the free trial to help you determine whether you want to invest in yourself and in this is new online ketamine infusion training course. Just think, if you enrolled in The Ketamine Academy your new clinic could easily be added to my directory for the grand opening!

Originally posted on The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

February 1 2018

Ketamine Therapy: Does Age Make A Difference On The Success of Treatment?

susangayhart Blog alone, antidepressants, anxiety, clinical depression, death, depressed, depression, depression signals, effects without ketamine, emotions, grief, help, hope, hospitalizations, insight, ketamine, ketamine day, ketamine effects, ketamine infusions, ketamine shots, Major Depressive Disorder, meditation, mental health, mental illness, myketaminestory, panic attacks, sadness, suicidal depression, suicide, suicide prevention, symptoms, treatment resistant depression, treatments

Hello again. This is Susan from myketaminestory.com. Welcome to my Ketamine blog for the Boise Ketamine Clinic website. I am excited to have another platform on which to share my experience with Ketamine treatments, in hopes of educating others on the potential this drug has for helping those, like me, with Treatment Resistant Depression (TRD).

As a brief summary for those new to my blog, I write about my experiences and journey with Ketamine Therapy on my personal website, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, and of course for The Boise Ketamine Clinic. I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders. My personal mental health care resume includes numerous failed medication cocktails, ECT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Talk Therapy and hospitalizations. I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they never did for me. It was a little over two and half years ago that I was introduced to Ketamine for depression. I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

I have often wondered if age has any relevance on how ketamine therapy is utilized.

I know for me, it was several decades before I found ketamine for treatment-resistant depression. I had tried numerous treatments in the past. I have written in the past about the many forms of therapy I have tried during my search for a successful treatment. These treatments include psychotherapy, art therapy, music therapy, animal therapy, basically I tried every kind of therapy you can think of really.

Without lasting results.

Throughout my life, I really tried hard to locate some kind of treatment that could lift the symptoms of my depression, in order for me to feel like life was worth living. I can say that before Ketamine, that in most instances, I haven’t felt that life was worth all the struggles. I constantly had to go through war zones in order to figure out a way to alleviate the pain that depression causes me.

I question.

How would my life have been different if I had found Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression years ago? I can’t realistically say. Life is unpredictable. I do, however, feel the need to reflect.

I inquire within.

Lost.

I would have loved to discover Ketamine decades ago, but it wasn’t an option. I had a vast array of life experiences and failed treatments before Ketamine was a common word spoken in my household.

I have had years and years of depression and anxiety. I’ve had many doctors attempt to treat me without any lasting success.

I searched and dug.

Nothing.

I have been under the care of several different doctors over the years, trying to locate that one treatment that would help me. Without success. It was during these lost years that I put in place unhealthy coping strategies. I found myself often trying to self-medicate with alcohol. I reached out and found that I have abused food for comfort. I can admit that I have used people for distractions. I have even implemented excessive exercising as an escape. I have tried many methods to alleviate my depression.

I have decades of bad habits that I formed in order to cope with my depression. I feel that maybe the longer that you have suffered with Treatment-Resistant Depression without improvements can jeopardize long term recovery.

Over the years, I have put in place all the different types of treatments plans, coping strategies, and insights from my psychotherapy trying to understand depression, my depression. In the past I have spent much time trying to figure out how I played a part in all the craziness that’s inside my head.

I have always felt like I was behind an 8-ball; like there was nothing I could really do in order to lift my depression.

I couldn’t drink enough.

I couldn’t exercise enough.

I couldn’t eat enough.

I couldn’t talk enough.

I couldn’t cry enough.

The depression was winning.

I felt like I just couldn’t do enough.

I wanted to have all the control, and I didn’t; and I don’t. On many levels, I don’t understand. I don’t understand why I felt depressed and anxious when nothing warranted the feelings. I didn’t get why I was plagued by this heaviness, this deep desire to end my life. I think it’s when you put years of failed treatments to get better that you start to doubt that you ever will get better. I know this was true for me. I imagine it’s true for others.

I know that when I found Ketamine as a form of treatment for my depression, I didn’t have high hopes. However, it remarkably surprised me with its ability to lift, consistently, my symptoms of depression. Ketamine switches off my depression filters. You know, those filters that make it impossible to process information the same way others do? Ketamine allows me the luxury of clarity.

I know that processing information continues to be an issue for me. I think that when you spend years and years utilizing different techniques, medications, and trying different methods for lifting the depression and the suicidal thinking without success, you start to second guess that you will ever get better. I know I doubt it. I doubted it. I started to question everything. The biggest problem I kept encountering was whether or not I even had anything wrong with me. I started to believe that I was causing my own suffering. I was at fault. It was because I was a horrible person that I was being punished; daily. I’m sure other people have felt this way as well. I’m sure I’m not unique or special in my outlook on my mental health.

What I do know is it makes sense that if you have spent so many years trying to find a solution to your problem that you will fail at times, but hopefully you’ll find some success as well. This has not been my experience in the past. It just hasn’t been. I feel like I kept trying new things and getting the same old results: nothing.

Nothing at all.

I really felt that I was the problem. I think this is a disservice to those of us with mental illnesses. I feel like our society has made it unacceptable, in the past, to talk about mental illness. It was often difficult to get the required help that I needed when I was living in a world of chaos. That’s how mental illness feels for me; chaos in the midst of silence.

It saddens me to look back across my past and see all of the therapies that I’ve tried. The investments that I’ve made in my health. All for the sake of being able to function in the world as though I didn’t have these filters in place. I wanted to live as though my world wasn’t obscured and tainted by darkness and evil.

So, I would have to think that for someone that has spent decades trying to get better, trying to gain control of their life, that during these times they would also implement unhealthy coping mechanisms. This is truth for me.

I have acted out.

I’ve been angry.

I am still angry.

I am hoping that this anger will dissipate as I gain a deeper understanding for the way in which I processed information in the past and how I can change the way in which I perceive my world now that I have Ketamine lifting my depression.

The reason that I mentioned past therapies and coping behaviors is because I feel like the more people that I talk to regarding Ketamine therapy, I am noticing a theme. Maybe. That theme is age related. Is it possible that maybe age makes a difference in how quickly Ketamine repairs the mind. The more people that I converse with about their experience with Ketamine therapy and their recovery process, the more I’m convinced that age plays a crucial element in how Ketamine works.

What I mean by this is, I’m beginning to see a correlation between age and how long Ketamine lasts before needing a maintenance schedule or a single booster. I have asked myself many times why is it that a twenty year old can have six infusions and be able to go three months without needing another infusion or another Ketamine shot.

Why is that?

I mean, wouldn’t you would think that Ketamine would work the same for everyone that has treatment-resistant depression?

I am a firm believer in the fact that Ketamine reduces inflammation. I’m a believer that inflammation is the root of depression. However, I am not sure if the inflammation causes the depression or if depression causes inflammation, but either way I feel the more I learn about depression, my depression, and other people’s depression is that there is definitely an inflammation component to almost every case that I’ve heard about. Granted, I’m not a doctor, I haven’t seen hundreds of cases, but the more I read about Ketamine and have my own experiences with Ketamine to reference, the more I am convinced that age is a factor. I think it is more about the amount of time a person has had to deal with their mental illness.

I am in recovery. I can totally see how Ketamine plays a major part in my ability to function in society.

I have spoken to many people searching for a treatment to help them, and in their investigations they’ve come across my website. I have had several people reach out to me with many questions. It is during these communications that I have discovered questions of my own. I have been fortunate enough to have open and honest discussions with sufferers of all ages. One thing I have noticed is that the younger generation – and keep in mind that I’m 48 – but the younger crowd, the ones in their twenties are responding so well to Ketamine. It has been remarkable to me that they can have 6 infusions and then go months without needing assistance from Ketamine.

That was not my experience. I wish it was. Financially. Ketamine is phenomenal. How great would it be if it It could last months? That has not been my story, but I am always grateful for what Ketamine gives me: symptom free days. It’s perplexing to me that Ketamine can, for some people, last months. I find this to be true for the lucky few. It appears that those that can get relief for more than a couple weeks are in their twenties or early thirties. So, I ask myself why is that? Why is it that Ketamine works so efficiently for some and only mildly for others? What I mean when I say efficiently is that they can go a month, two months, or even three months between boosters of Ketamine. However, there are many of us, like me, that need to have Ketamine once a week or once every two weeks. I’ve given this some thought. I’m always intrigued by the unknown. There is so little known about Ketamine and how it works and why it works.

I know that there is more research and papers being written about the science behind Ketamine However, there are many speculations about why Ketamine works for those that haven’t had any success in the past with other forms of treatments. I have tried many treatments such as ECT, psychotherapy, numerous different medication cocktails, and hospitalizations. All with the hopes of getting better.

I’m not seeing the world so bleakley now. I am seeing hope. I am seeing light and colors. I have a deep desire to want to wake up each morning and start a new day. There have been many mornings in my past that I woke up only to start crying because I had to face another day. There’s a big difference between wanting to start a new day and having to start a new day! I have had many mornings of unstoppable tears because I was still alive and once again I had to go through yet another day of this grueling and unforgiving disease with no relief.

When I tried Ketamine infusions I was pretty excited to discover that it actually worked for me. I didn’t expect it to. I have written about this many times. Without the risk of sounding repetitive, it’s important to understand the depth of my depression and how it affected every aspect of my life. This is very true for many people. I understand that. I realized that I am not alone in this fight, in this war, in this battle to gain back control of my life, of our lives. It’s not an easy task. It’s frustrating, and for me that leads to anger-provoking thoughts and feelings. There have been countless times when I want to give up; even when I feel good. It’s just a lot of work fighting depression and I’m not shy about doing the work. I have been for decades!

I can say that I’m immensely thrilled by the prospect of getting better. I am getting better. It is an agonizing process. A painfully slow progression.

Does it make me irritable?

Yes!

It is hard for me to understand how Ketamine is influencing my life sometimes, but I’ve had a lot of deep Insights and growth over the last three years because of Ketamine. I know in my heart I would not be alive today If Ketamine wasn’t being used to treat depression.

I have written and shared many tips about my discoveries with Ketamine and how it affects my life, but I always come back to the familiar question spinning around in my mind and that is, why is it that I need a Ketamine shot every week or two? I have spoken to a couple of Ketamine recipients who don’t have to get Ketamine as often as I do.

It was because of this question about why some depression sufferers need regular Ketamine maintenance that I started to take notice of who I was talking to, what age they were, and what their history has been. I am interested in what kinds of therapies had they tried. It was during these discussions that I received similar answers from several people that I saw a common theme. It appeared that those in their twenties that have tried Ketamine infusions were having a higher success rate – in terms of how long they could go in between Ketamine treatments. Why is that?

It has been over the last three years and I have determined that the reason that those in their twenties might be more capable of making the period of time between treatments longer. I would love to open this topic up for comments, because I am very curious as to whether I might be on the right path of thought. It could be that the time between their Ketamine therapy is lengthened because they don’t have as many bad coping habits put in place. It could be that they don’t have as many misunderstandings of their emotions due to the fact that they are younger. They haven’t had as many life experiences. They haven’t had to spend decades trying to cope with the depression. It is because of these added years dealing with coping with the depression that you end up having, or you end up putting in place, thoughts and beliefs about your depression; your life.

To get to my point and clarify, I will use an example of an elementary school student learning to study for a spelling test. These young children don’t have a lot of experience with studying, reviewing, and taking tests. They are extremely new at it. They haven’t created bad study habits yet. They don’t have years of failed exams to cause them worry or fear about the next pop quiz in their lives. Right now, for those elementary kids, it’s all about learning how to take an exam. It is about learning to prepare for and how to take a test. Everything is new. They can form good habits and excel. However if that same student didn’t study, didn’t have the support or someone to teach them the best way to approach taking a test, to learn new information, those good study skills can quickly be converted into struggles and anxiety. If a student is not shown the proper way to approach that first spelling test, all subsequent exams will be more difficult.

If you were to take these youngsters, any of them, and teach them positive study habits and special methods of retaining information, I am sure their success on future tests is guaranteed to be significantly better over time. That would surely be my guess. Those that have no support at home or are never taught proper pronunciation or ways in which to go about studying, and they were just left alone in the dark and expected to learn 20 new words just like their classmates, the likelihood of failure is compounded. This is a problem because they were never given the proper tools for readiness. Can we expect them to have the same successes as those that were taught healthy habits for studying? This can be true for all aspects of our lives, not just studying for an exam.

Now take that same student and fast forward ten years. They are now ready to go off to high school. A solid foundation is key. You have two students and both of them were taught differently about how to approach taking a test. These two students are now in high school. We have one peer that had been taught wonderful study habits and have had great successes throughout their education. You also have a student, for whatever reason, who did not get the support they needed. They were not taught with love and guidance. They were, in fact, left to discover how to study on their own. They have had success, but more failures throughout their education.

The same two students are now in college.

Is it possible to now teach excellent study habits to the student that struggled to figure it out on their own?

They have both had ten years of schooling now, and the one that lacked the assistance they needed to learn for years. Can you offer that student support, educational techniques, or special classes in order to catch them up and change their ability to take exams in the future?

I think it’s possible. They have had the unfortunate experience of learning poorly for several years, but it’s not too late.

The reason I feel that it is possible to rewire or reprogram the way they learn is solely due to the number of years they have been utilizing this skill or habit. I feel, if given the proper tools and support, the likelihood of that student improving their tests scores increases. Granted, change can take place quicker for the students when they are in high school than say in college. In college you have years of habits to break, so it may become more difficult to learn healthier, more satisfying ways to approach learning.

Years of exams.

Many attempts to conquer and walk away with an A only to slide by with a C-. This example demonstrates what I think might happen to people with depression that start using Ketamine treatments as an antidepressant.

I do believe that Ketamine therapy is working the same for people, of all age groups. I do. I believe that Ketamine reduces the symptoms of depression. I think the Ketamine works the same at reducing the inflammation of the brain, allowing connections to be made, growth to occur, perceptions to be clarified, and my thoughts slow down; making change possible. These are all positives elements that Ketamine provides for me and many others.

You have a drug that aids in the battle of Treatment Resistant Depression. A drug unlike any past treatments for Clinical Depression. As I have stated multiple times in my writings, Ketamine has been the only medication that has offered me relief from the suicidal depression I felt non-stop. I was very much like that student that learned poor, unhealthy, unsuccessful study habits. I went years trying to utilize those same skills for every aspect of my life without success. I would tweak the lesson to fit the situation. I might approach the problem from a different direction. I would get off one road and hop on to another hoping to find the answers for why I couldn’t experience life the same way many people do in our society that don’t have mental illnesses blocking them. And for me, I continued to go through life with the same disruptive and self-defeating skills with the hopes of one day figuring out where I went wrong. It wasn’t until I started Ketamine therapy that I discovered that I wasn’t the problem. There was actually something wrong with my brain. It seems obvious that a person that is suicidal pretty much their entire lives may have something wrong with their brain, their chemical makeup.

I haven’t always thought that I was the problem, but after many failed attempts at combating the depression with traditional methods, I started to have conflicting beliefs. And unfortunately the illness feeds hungrily on those doubts. I would beat myself up for once again messing up an exam.

If we return to the students beginning their education differently you might be able to see how those unpopular and worthless skills would definitely interfere with your recovery. I went through elementary school, high school, college and many years of freelance education trying to improve myself and adjust the way I see the world and how I take my exams. I had obstacle after obstacle to jump, climb, or walk under. I would switch up my approach, but still the depression filters continued to confuse the lessons.

I have now been out of school for years and yet I was still using the same old patterns. I would think that I was making corrections, and I probably was. The only problem was the chronic suicidal depression was still clouding up my results.

Once again let us return to my example of the student making their way through their education. The individual that received intervention early and was taught the proper way to process information and utilize those facts later may have greater success in their lives. They received the help they needed and responded in a magnificent way.

They can grow and move on.

Flourish.

If that same student was put in special classes with teachers that lacked passion and whom glossed over your mistakes or misunderstandings the outcome may be completely different. I see myself as the student that was seeking new study habits but had no instructor with the correct teachings mending my past errors and disappointments.

Nothing helped.

I continued to search for ways to understand the information presented to me. I taught myself ways of coping but failure followed me for decades. I was not fortunate to find a guide or professor that spoke my language.

Until Ketamine.

Ketamine is my teacher now. I am hearing. I am seeing. I am reprogramming the failed systems from my past. It takes time. Painful time. I have to go back and unlearn those lessons I was sure would benefit me. They did not. I have much chaos to sort through. I now have an excellent counselor in Ketamine. I have walls built many feet deep that I must bulldoze. I have had to rebuild my foundation. Decades of buildings to destroy. I am now building a city from all I am digesting from my master, Ketamine.

I realize that this is a long-winded explanation of why I think age plays a part in how Ketamine helps. I feel that if the person is introduced to Ketamine at a younger age, say at the young age of twenty, they have far less history with life. They don’t have as many hang ups or misconceptions. They have less experience living. They have fewer disappointments to sort through and accept. Could it be this reason that they have a greater possibility of going longer periods of time without needing a booster shot of Ketamine?

I feel those that don’t find Ketamine until they are in their forties or fifties may be at a disadvantage.

Why?

Mainly, I feel that age plays a significant role in how often Ketamine maintenance is needed because of past coping mechanisms and failed treatments. There is history with experiences.

Ketamine, it would be like that struggling student having someone interject themselves into your life at a young age and teach you the proper way to go about taking test, any test, even a spelling test.

You learn.

You grow.

You fail.

You grow.

However, if you have to keep changing your study style in hopes of doing better in school, but it is never explained why what you were doing wasn’t working for you, it could be excruciating and soul crushing. You might keep trying to figure it out. Years of research and trials. It gets confusing. It becomes discouraging.

I suppose that it is not how Ketamine works better for one person over another but more so how Ketamine is perceived. What I mean is, the older you get the more cynical you become about finding relief and success. You have many more years of faulty therapies and medications to taint your recovery. Far too many techniques put in place in order to survive the constant noise and desire for death.

Ketamine offers relief from the symptoms of depression. It does. Understanding life without depression is both rewarding and frustrating. That is probably true for everyone. Ketamine is an aid not a cure. You still have to heal. You still have to do the work. The bonus is that the work you engage in, such as cognitive behavioral therapy, begins to help. I have spent hundreds of hours in various types of therapy over the past three decades and just never felt I was making progress. Ketamine suppresses the depression long enough to benefit and allow recovery to begin. It even gives you a glimpse of your progress, if you pay attention.

I truly believe that if I had been told about Ketamine when I was first diagnosed at the young age of 18 my life may not have been so tragic. Please understand that I am not stating that younger people have it easy. I am just making an observation. If you find Ketamine at twenty you may have less baggage to sort through. It is a matter of time and experience.

Common sense.

Maybe?

Ketamine is an interesting treatment. I am constantly writing and investigating. I have grown. I am making progress. It is just slow, slow, slow. And confusing. I am continuously trying to make sense out of this very untraditional form of antidepressant.

I ask you.

Why is it that some people can go a month or more without a Ketamine booster?

Doesn’t the brain age, and damage occur? Does growth and connections continue every time I am treated with Ketamine? Does age affect the Ketamine and how effective it is and for how long?

Life experiences? Do they play a part?

I would be interested to hear what you think and what your experience has been with Ketamine therapy. Comment below or private message me.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

In part two of the series, Addressing Q uestions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression I addressed questions and concerns about Intramuscular Ketamine verses Ketamine Infusion therapy.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why Ketamine could help you. Also, if you would like to become a provider of Ketamine Therapy try enrolling in The Ketamine Academy‘s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course; it is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit the Boise Ketamine Clinic website for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Boise, Idaho area I suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. It doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need. You can also visit my Ketamine Provider & Location List to find a provider in your area.

Feel free to visit The Ketamine Academy if you want to become a Ketamine Provider. Think about enrolling in your dream today. If you are fascinated, but not yet ready to commit, I recommend the free trial to help you determine whether you want to invest in yourself and in this is new online ketamine infusion training course. Just think, if you enrolled in The Ketamine Academy your new clinic could easily be added to my directory for the grand opening!

Originally posted on The Boise Ketamine Clinic website.

January 18 2018

Ketamine Therapy Lifts Depression And Offers Insights Along With Some Confusion

susangayhart Blog, Home alone, antidepressants, anxiety, clinical depression, death, depressed, depression, depression signals, effects without ketamine, emotions, grief, help, hope, hospitalizations, insight, ketamine, ketamine day, ketamine effects, ketamine infusions, ketamine shots, Major Depressive Disorder, meditation, mental health, mental illness, myketaminestory, panic attacks, sadness, suicidal depression, suicide, suicide prevention, suidical depression, symptoms, treatment resistant depression, treatments

I recently wrote a blog, Ketamine Therapy And A New Emotional Language: Don’t Just Stand There, Feel Something, focused on managing and understanding a new emotional language now that Ketamine has lifted the depressive symptoms. It was after posting that article that I felt I needed to elaborate.

I have spent time logging the changes I feel I am making. How am I progressing? Am I? I often need to see it in writing to recognize growth. I have been really looking forward to writing what I have learned. I want to expound on the topic of redefining what depression is for me now. It has been a huge part of my recovery. I really believe that. It has been so incredibly confusing. My depression is lifted with the aid of Ketamine therapy and it leaves me being able to feel. Depression kills. It robs me of expressing myself. I don’t understand simple things. The concept of feeling is new to me. In a way. It is. It is still frustrating at times. I mentally record all the actions and emotions I categorized as part of being depressed. If asked how I felt, my standard replies were depressed or suicidal.

All my life, my world has been colored by the burdens of depression and anxiety.

It is my belief that these illnesses made it impossible to feel a vast number of emotions. I wasn’t aware that my emotional language was so limited. It took Ketamine therapy to open my eyes. I would just pile all types of unpleasant feelings and label them depressed Susan. I mentioned this annoyance in a recent blog. I know that blog entry only barely covered all I have unearthed by paying attention and repeatedly examining my feelings and relabeling my emotions with accurate terminology.

I began to realize after about a year of Ketamine an usual pattern in my assigning my words with the correct emotions. I noticed, for example, if I felt disappointed I quickly classified that sensation as a symptom of depression.

I know now that I habitually mislabeled my body and mind data. I continue to. I paid attention. If I hear my inner voice exclaim, man I am so miserable. I must be depressed. I am depressed. I would later write that I felt frustrated through the day, that must mean that I am depressed and the Ketamine is wearing off.

If I experienced an unsatisfying or unacceptable thought or feeling, it was because I was depressed again. I do this a lot. I am gaining the ability to differentiate. It is not an easy task. I have been defining all my feeling through my illness. I accept that. Maybe.

It is painful. Rewiring the brain is a tough task.

I was watching television the other day and cried during a commercial and automatically thought that must mean I am depressed. I halt everything I am doing and analyze the whys. I am afraid of tears now. My world has been filled with an ocean of tears. The tears represent depression for me. It is not a release or expression. It is a warning sign. It is a predictor of what is to come; debilitating sadness. Pure Hell. A nightmare I am forced to revisit.

It has been confusing.

You mean I can cry to express how charged up a movie made me? You mean, it is not because I am weak and see the world through this fogging filter? I can cry and not fall apart? I can cry and feel okay? I can cry and not have suicidal thoughts? I can cry and survive the pain? I can.

I am rewiring my brain. It is painful work. I keep pointing out flaws in my thinking and that hurts. I can be brutal. I attack. I want to be better than this. I must.

I am learning. I am human. I am flawed. I will not fall apart if I make a mistake. I can write a different ending. Ketamine helps me clarify and understand with hope and not the critical eye I typically view myself with.

Ketamine gives me the ability to disengage.

I don’t personalize my world nearly as much as I once did. I can find that I can get caught up with obsessing over interactions I have with others. When I am in need of Ketamine, which is generally every two weeks, and If I thought poorly of someone, or was hurt by a stranger, I decided my depression was clouding my experience and I am due for another treatment.

This is not alway true.

If I am able to stop and reflect, I may not be depressed. If I am capable of searching for another explanation or seeing the situation from another person’s point of view, I may be mislabeling my feelings or the motives of others.

It is exhausting work.

I, of course, did not become aware of just how many emotions I named depression until I started getting Ketamine therapy. I have no doubt in my mind that this new tool was acquired after I began Ketamine therapy. I feel it is absolutely because of the dissociative effects of Ketamine that I can separate myself from my illness. I get to step outside of myself. Disconnect. I find clarity where once only suicide resided. I am convinced that because of the way Ketamine allows me freedom from my illness, I am capable of feeling an array of emotions now.

I have literally been forced to learn the differences between the simple words. The ones we are taught as children in Kindergarten. Common terms like sad, happy, good, and bad were all placed behind the primary word dictating my experience: Depression.

In my past, it seems as though I understood feelings only in two categories: depressed and tolerable.

Ketamine has shaken up my emotional vocabulary.

It has been so strange. This is a lesson I was so unaware I needed to learn because of my love of words and their meanings. I prided myself on being a master at expressing myself with words. How could I not know the difference between clinical depression and a bad day?

Unfortunately, I often confuse my emotions. If I am exhausted, I often incorrectly label this emotion as depression. Add anxiety to the mixture, and I have been swimming in confusion. I am grateful for each and every lesson. I wish they were not so painful for me.

I equate many, many feelings for depression. It is sort of embarrassing. Okay, I admit it, I am hampered at times by the knowledge that I misrepresented my emotions. I am grateful not to blame every negative aspect of my life on depression. Perceptions are valuable. Depression plays games. It changes the rules constantly. I can understand how I would be so ignorant about the variances.

Ketamine allows me to recognize the slightest discrepancies in my feelings. I feel this has been crucial and immensely beneficial in my understanding of myself and how depression has affected my life as well as significant others in my world.

A raw experience. It hurts me deeply. Yet, I am appreciative. I know these insights propel me forward. I am not stuck.

I have a goal. I am stating it here for all to read. I want to eliminate the word depressed from my vocabulary. I plan to only allow myself to describe how I am doing as depressed if I am spending too much time entertaining suicidal thoughts. I enjoy the dictionary. I will search my bank of words and try to redefine my perceptions.

I strive to better understand my emotions. I know with education that I can define a brighter future for myself.

I find it interesting that I routinely misjudge my feelings. I have been involved in some form of therapy for three decades. I spent years in psychotherapy discussing and analyzing my actions and emotions. Years.

And I was doing it all wrong?

It has been challenging. I insist on practicing my ability to not tear myself apart for what I did not know at the time. I am making changes.

I am rewiring.

I know I will falter. I vow to be patient during this process. I feel it is a vital process. It is an extraordinary lesson and one that will make living a tiny bit better for me now. I am sure I will be surprised by what doors and windows will open up and assist me in finding inner peace.

More than anything, I want acceptance. I fight it. I am bitter. I have lived with debilitating treatment resistant depression for decades. I don’t want to feel sorry for myself. I want to be better than that.

Acceptance.

Ugh. I am determined to reach a point when I don’t resent the added challenges being mentally ill has. It definitely throws obstacles in my path at the most inopportune times. Disruptions.

I am a long distance away from acceptance, but I am hopeful.

I am a student. Ketamine has been nominated as my teacher. I love my teacher. I hate the exams.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why Ketamine could help you. Also, if you would like to become a provider of Ketamine Therapy try enrolling in The Ketamine Academy‘s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course; it is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

n conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit the Boise Ketamine Clinic website for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Boise, Idaho area I suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. It doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need. You can also visit my Ketamine Provider & Location List to find a provider in your area.

Originally posted on The Boise Ketamine Clinic

January 12 2018

Ketamine And Mental Health Relapses: A Painful Process

susangayhart Blog antidepressants, clinical depression, depressed, depression, depression signals, effects without ketamine, emotions, hospitalizations, insomnia, ketamine, ketamine day, ketamine effects, ketamine infusions, ketamine shots, Major Depressive Disorder, mental health, mental illness, myketaminestory, suicidal depression, suicide, suicide prevention, symptoms, treatment resistant depression

I made it to Ketamine day. I have been on the outskirts of depression multiple days now. I am actually surprised that the depression filters have not destroyed me yet. It is like a force field. I can feel it radiating towards me, but it looks like my Ketamine shot will occur before it can wrap its claws into me. I am grateful. I am also blessed to have a wonderful supportive husband and son. They love me as I am, Illness and all.

I am dealing with enough; a deeper demon now. My anxiety. The chronic pain in my hands the intensity is plenty to cope with. I can’t seem to combat the anxiety and OCD tendencies. I need more help. I need clarity. I am afraid. I lack courage, but I am forced to face my demons. I have an appointment to see my doctor today for Ketamine, and hopefully, I will be strong enough to believe my life is worth saving. My anxiety wants to kills me and all that I strive to become. May I find an answer or solution to why I am experiencing physical pain and overwhelming anxiety.

I am terrified. I am longing to get answers, hoping, but more so I need relief. I am suffering insomnia badly because of the pain and terror. It is constant 24 hours nonstop. I am also paralyzed with fear. It is choking me.

I am obsessing about how this will never end and how unbearable it is. And what is the point? I work so hard. I endure. Why? I still honestly feel in the pit of my stomach that all this work won’t kill the beast and in the end, my end, this illness will surely kill me by my own hands.

Yeah, right there on the outskirts of hell is where I am standing. You think it is hot, but it is cold as a bitter winter and you are completely naked. I long for that down jacket. I can see the poison and taste it on my lips. I am pushing back. I write and discover that my thoughts are drifting towards the default setting. That depression setting has a password I can’t hack. I would love to give it a nasty virus but instead anxiety attacks when I am in stand-by mode. I believe now as I write that the anxiety has definitely disguised the depression signals I usually get before Ketamine day. I recognize that all of these feelings will only multiply if I wasn’t on my way to get my treatment today. I spiral quickly once that force field shuts off. I am so appreciative of Ketamine. I am.

It is all just too much lately. The last several weeks have not been pleasant at all. I am exhausted. I am fearing what the results will be if this pain and anxiety doesn’t cease.

Ketamine can only do so much. It doesn’t combat all evils, but I like to think it does enough……

I will be heading out to my appointment. Soon. I am sure I will get the help I need and my writings will reflect the difference. I seriously don’t make this shit up. It is like night and day. Two different people carrying the same baggage. The Ketamine keeps that mess locked up tight in a gorgeous designer bag. The days leading up to my treatment, that baggage is kept in a used torn plastic garbage bag; everything just bursting at the seams and utterly ugly. Man, I can’t wait for that shift.

However, I know once that shift occurs, I have to take on my most challenging obstacle since discovering Ketamine for Depression; my anxiety. It is trying to eliminate me. I must ask for help. That is not a strong trait of mine. I have no choice. I will die if I don’t deal with my shit eventually. It hurts. I am afraid. I might need more support and assistance than I care to admit.

Something tells me it is time to open the designer bags and root around for the button to detonate the anxiety before it eliminates me. This may require a treatment plan I don’t want to follow.

Do I want life?

The Ketamine lifts the depression, but the years of turmoil still have to be waded through and put to rest. I have been dancing around enjoying the colors. I think anyone would. Darkness is no way to live. The anxiety threatens my colorful world. I have coped the only way I felt worked for me. That method has failed me and I am on the edge. My thoughts are bleak. I can’t breathe. I am overwhelmed. I feel so alone. I am at risk.

I see my doctor later today and I will unfortunately have to take drastic steps to rescue Susan, because when I looked in the mirror earlier today I didn’t recognize myself. The colors are grey and my eyes empty. I won’t lie, I am afraid.

However, I will speak up, stand tall and work through it because like Robert Frost and Alanis Morissette like to remind me – the only way out is through….. Unfortunately.

I fight against any other medicines besides Ketamine. I resent all the side effects I have had over the years. I don’t experience any with Ketamine. I fear becoming a zombie. I don’t want to lose myself again. I have lost so much this month; I can’t lose Susan, too. I will get the help I need. I can advocate. I must keep myself safe. I must because my husband and son told me today that they want to wake up tomorrow knowing I am still a part of their world. I will battle for them until I am strong enough to wage this war for me and only me,

Ketamine will lift these suicidal thoughts and depression, but now it it time to get real about the anxiety before it ruins me. It feels so over bearing and powerful. I am on a journey. I wish it just didn’t hurt so deep and cost even more.

I totally enjoy writing. I love it.

Do you know that feeling when you are looking forward to a particular event or task and then you fall ill the day of ? I do too. I am drained. I am flat out depressed. I want to write more and inspire but my arms feel like concrete. I am getting my Ketamine shot tonight. I am incredibly grateful. I am so in need.

I feel a heavy weight on my chest. It hurts to breathe. My day was filled with questions and uncertainty. I was involved in several panic attacks today and my insomnia is out of control. I feel that with the depression comes paranoid beliefs. My world is filtered with some obscure dirty lens. I can pull back the camera and wipe the lens clean and the reality around me is still utterly foggy.

I begin to think people are against me. I search for all the behaviors to support these thoughts. I was never aware that I did this until maybe a year into my Ketamine treatments. Ketamine opens my eyes to my flaws, but more successfully it allows me to see myself in a positive light. And now the anxiety is biting for control. I can’t win.

Depression tears down your self esteem and desire for life. It makes you hate, yes hate, everything you are. I feel unnecessarily weak in character. I lack my usual confidence. The self assurance I have gained from being free of depression following my Ketamine shots. I can’t wait until I can feel that calm and reassured again.

When I get this low. I still find myself afraid that this time the Ketamine therapy won’t work. I am not as terrified as I was two and a half years ago, but I am a natural worrier. Plus, I know now what being without depression feels like. I can’t go back. I fear what would happen to me without Ketamine. When the depression steals my attention I can only focus on disastrous self-destructive thoughts. I find depression’s best friend, anxiety wants my soul and mind in creative ways depression couldn’t even fathom.

I have also noticed that colors are not as bright. It is as though I am walking through quicksand. The world and the people in it are all moving and showing all appearances of living but I walk around in a haze; suffocating. I am drowning. I don’t feel like I am a part of society. I am an invisible visitor. I only desire to find my safe place; this often means thoughts of suicide. Ketamine is my life preserver.

I watch people talking and I believe they are judging me. I am convinced the world is against me. It horrifies me to know that I willingly believe that every single person in the universe hates me. I understand the whys. I loathe depressed anxious Susan. I can’t phantom anyone appreciating me and my mental health issues. I surely don’t.

Ketamine is needed.

And more.

I fear more is needed this time.

I truly believe that we all have to advocate for ourselves. The more informed we are the better we can address the issues and know what to expect. Ketamine is not like other antidepressants. It doesn’t have side effects to deal with. However, the therapy itself might be something you have to adjust to. I will explain more when I am functioning on all cylinders. I am surprised I was able to blog at all today. It was a struggle.

While I work on my recovery feel free to catch up on a few on my past blogs If you are interested in educating yourself on Ketamine therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression. You can check out the four-part series I wrote answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.In part two of the series, Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression I addressed questions and concerns about Intramuscular Ketamine versus Ketamine Infusion therapy. In my third blog, Frequently Asked Questions: Redefining Depression With The Assistance Of Ketamine Therapy, I was a bit more random. I had emails with several questions and themes, and I addressed as many inquiries as I could. In my final question and answer dialogue, Pondering Concerns & Questions: The Benefits Of Ketamine For Treatment Resistant Depression, I discussed research, clinical studies, and the need for changes to occur within our insurance companies and federal government so that maybe one day Ketamine will not be so difficult to afford or obtain, from any qualified healthcare professional.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit the Boise Ketamine Clinic website for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Boise, Idaho area I suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. It doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need. You can also visit my Ketamine Provider & Location List to find a provider in your area.

Originally posted on The Boise Ketamine Clinic website

January 5 2018

Ketamine Therapy And Why The Disassociative Effect May Be A Positive And Not A Side Effect To Eliminate

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Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

As a brief summary, I write about my experiences and journey with Ketamine Therapy on my website, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, and also for The Boise Ketamine Clinic. I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders. My personal mental health care resume includes numerous failed medication cocktails, ECT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Talk Therapy and hospitalizations. I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they never did for me. It was a little over two and half years ago that I was introduced to Ketamine for depression. I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

One of the most controversial aspects of Ketamine therapy, and what I think is one of the biggest injustices in terms of information and research, is stating how the Side Effects of Ketamine are the dissociative effects it causes during treatments. I personally want to put an end to these reports on how supposedly horrible this aspect of Ketamine therapy is for a person.

I will briefly state by copying and pasting the definition of dissociation.

Dissociation is any of a wide array of experiences from mild detachment from immediate surroundings to more severe detachment from physical and emotional experience. The major characteristic of all dissociative phenomena involves a detachment from reality, rather than a loss of reality as in psychosis.

Ketamine can make you feel that you are outside yourself. I believe it is this sensation that makes it possible to distinguish that you are not your illness. I am not my depression. I did not cause this to happen. It is real. I feel the difference. I know the world symptom free. I feel the glory in that knowledge. After years of failed treatments, I have wavered on my part in my suffering. Nothing helps. It must be in my head, but not. I have battled with blaming myself for not being able to leave my house. I have been ashamed and confused. I fight to make sense of this hellish world.

How can I want to be in darkness when there are brilliant colors to discover? Why am I doing this to myself?

Anger.

This is not my fault. I just haven’t found the right treatment.

But…..

I have tried everything but brain surgery to combat this disease.

I am failing.

I can’t win.

Another cocktail of medications. Vacancy. More lost time, and destruction. I shake my head remembering my story.

Hospital stay.

ECT.

Gone. I am lost.

Susan hides for years.

Afraid.

Why can’t I escape?

I tried many methods of denial.

Anger.

Ketamine.

Yes, now I can heal. Now, I know that, the craziness, it is not me. It is an illness. A silent disease. Killing.

Drowning.

Ketamine is my life preserver.

It saddens me to read articles and frequently asked question on the Ketamine websites stating the effects of Ketamine during treatments negatively. I am here to put an end to the alert. I feel that the dissociation I have felt during several of my sessions has made it possible to break away from the stigma mental illness has had, and the failure I feel repeatedly when in the past medications, ECT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, talk therapy, art therapy and other treatments resisted my efforts to get well and put my life back together.

Impossible.

I formed unhealthy coping mechanisms.

It is hard to separate your personality with the depression. “I am depressed. That is who I am.”

Depression consumes me.

I am depression.

I am my illness.

Ketamine changed that belief.

It was because the dissociation I felt during some of my Ketamine appointments made it obvious I was not this hideous illness. It seems obvious. I would say, “I am not this nightmare,” but I had doubts.

Many doubts.

It was when I was feeling light and calm during my Ketamine therapy that I felt free. I broke free. I could reach a point where I saw my personal core, Susan. I did not have that tainted with rainstorms and thunder distracting me. I could have cried. I actually have cried. Purging emotions. It is a relief to know the truth. Painful, too. Years of just barely getting by. Trying to survive. Miserable. In pain. “Not worth it” was a common theme. I practiced. I did the homework. I walked through the fires. Nothing.

Falling.

Ketamine caught me. It was with the aid of Ketamine and this so-called negative side effect known as the dissociative effect that Ketamine Infusions provide. Is it to be feared? Is that necessary?

I personally don’t want Ketamine without it. It doesn’t happen during every treatment. I have learned that it happens when I most need to escape from the madness. I can get a glimpse of my situation without the hateful comments shouting for control. I get to live the statement I uttered in defeat previously.

I just need to get over myself. I need to get out of my own way. I want to escape. I want clarity and most of all please let me stop with the death wish.

Ketamine provides….

I find the sessions that gift me with the dissociation grant me the biggest uplift from the depression. I feel complete hope. I feel I can make it. I can win. I can have a life. A life outside my house. A life living. A life.

A life.

I have not had the luxury of experiencing living with that heaviness and burden. It taints everything. I need to know that there is more to the world, to me. I need to know that if I keep pushing forward I will gain back my sanity. If it is all for nothing, I couldn’t bear it.

I couldn’t.

Ketamine leaves me hopeful.

I believe that it is the experiences I have during my Ketamine therapy that makes it so successful for me. I often feel as though I am being hugged by the most loving universal mother or god. It gives me hope.

Hope has been missing for decades.

I look forward to the intense moments with Ketamine. They give me permission to let go of the guilt and blame I feel. I feel loved. It can be spiritual. An awakening.

I close my eyes and flow. It is dream-like. Freeing. No room for depression to live here. I get to see and feel what Susan could be. I am. I am Susan. I am not this depression that demands the majority of my attention. Ketamine is hope that I can one day be the girl I see.

I don’t make it easy for Ketamine. I have had decades of failed treatments. I lost so much during the years battling my way to the surface again and again. I fight my way to catch a glimpse of a dim light trying to guide me; unsuccessfully. I have accumulated an array of unhealthy thinking patterns, and worse, I couldn’t respond to attempts to be positive or recognize change. It never felt like I was making progress. I was, on some levels, I suppose. It is drastically different with Ketamine.

I am blessed with the knowledge of absolute reassurance that I am not the depression. It is a difficult lesson to believe in. I waiver. I stumble. Ketamine keeps me standing. I appreciate having faith in a treatment. A therapy that allows my past lessons to excel and propel me forward instead of keeping me stuck.

I can’t imagine getting Ketamine without the chance of having it include some element of dissociation. I would not want to, the knowing that I will never experience that freedom and pure relief from the depression and reclaim my hope for a future over and over again. It would sadden me deeply.

I don’t understand why there are so many negative articles being written about how Ketamine shouldn’t be used for depression because it has the side effect, yes the side effect, of feelings of dissociation. I don’t know about you, but I enjoy not feeling the never ending desire to die. I think it is life altering to gain perspective on Treatment Resistant Depression and how it controls all aspects of your life and thoughts. It has aided me greatly. Ketamine has been extremely beneficial for me.

I believe that depression tells lies. I have been lied to for years. Ketamine is refreshing. I gain. I have not lost myself indefinitely because Ketamine reaches down inside the deepest parts of me and offers HOPE. That is fantastic to me. I can resist the lures that make a point of trying to hook me and pull me to the bottom for longer periods of time because Ketamine has made me a personal witness of what could be.

I fear that pharmaceutical companies will change the Ketamine composition too much to be the huge assistance it is today. It will take away that element that lets me gain insights, suppresses the depression and provides me hope. Do I want that to happen? Do I want to risk the added chemicals they will add to eliminate an effect that does not hinder but offers a look at the world in a new refreshing light? Would I risk it? I hope I never have to, to be honest. I know “real” side effects from antidepressant drugs and the damage they cause. I have been in enough emergency rooms and psychiatric hospitals because of the latest combination of medications. I don’t want to revisit the past. I shouldn’t have to because Ketamine is perfect the way it is.

I end with one question for you to contemplate. I know that medication development is profitable and there is no money in making Ketamine available to the masses. I also know that the professional world is afraid of Ketamine and that is because of lack of education and the risks they foresee Ketamine causing their practices. I get it. Sort of. I don’t understand changing what is not broken. I also don’t trust. I don’t believe a new Ketamine type drug won’t be without true side effects and concerns. A drug is already available. No changes needed. I leave my doctors office feeling uplifted. I walk away leaving the depression behind me for a week or more. One drug. Side effects? I laugh and shake my head. Dissociation is not to be feared. It is not to be spoke of so negatively. Yes, it is a different type of therapy but it is successful to many, including myself. In less than an hour of possible surreal experiences, I gain a part of myself I felt died as a child and left me empty, alone, with only a terrorist for a partner and guide. I think one hour every week or two is a small request for what we demand in return; symptom free times ahead. Ketamine is a winner. Just the way it is. I have no complications with Ketamine. I am afraid that once the chemists play around with Ketamine, this will no longer be the case. I could be wrong. I don’t think I am. Medications make money. If they make a ketamine-like drug in the future, I won’t be standing in line for it because I trust whatever is added to the formula will not be better than what is already making history for Treatment Resistant Depression.

Ketamine.

I felt a strong need to address all the negative talk associated with Ketamine therapy and the dissociation many are experiencing. I believe it is difficult to understand how Ketamine works and that makes many uncomfortable. It is unknown. People resist change. In my opinion, I think depression is more an inflammation issue versus depression being a 100% chemical issue. Inflammation. I am becoming more and more convinced that depression compromises all of me. Body and mind. I plan to discuss in a little more detail, in my next blog, how diet, infections and thus how inflammation is key to getting healthy. Ketamine reduces inflammation. Anti-depressant alter chemistry. I believe there is something worth investigating and discussing. I know that I record and analyze every aspect of my care and recovery with the long term goal of being healthy in mind and body. I want control. I pay attention. I want to predict. I want to know. I strive to educate and help others skip these uncertain times I have had.

I have found that when I am physically ill or eat poorly, the assistance I get from Ketamine therapy is limited. Why is that? Inflammation? Maybe.

Join me next week when I review what I have learned about foods and my depression. I have experimented. I record. I hope to adjust my treatment plan with all this newfound knowledge about myself, mental illness, and Ketamine. Diet is important. We can take back a little control of our lives and illness. It can happen.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why Ketamine could help you. Also, if you would like to become a provider of Ketamine Therapy try enrolling in The Ketamine Academy‘s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course; it is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

Originally posted on The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

January 1 2018

Ketamine Therapy And A New Emotional Language: Don’t Just Stand There, Feel Something

Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

If you have been following along with my blogs you know that I have been struggling lately with staying healthy. I wrote about my recent fall into that bitter, cold, lonely, blackness called clinical depression, Ketamine Treatments And Benzodiazepines: My Journey And Discoveries. The reason I mention my last blog is because I hinted at a future writing on what I refer to as my new emotional language. I have been really looking forward to this topic of redefining what depression is for me now. It has been confusing. It is still frustrating at times. All my life, my world has been colored by the burden of mental illness. An illness I feel has made it impossible to feel a vast number of emotions. I clumped all types of feelings as being a definition of the term depression. If I felt disappointed I quickly classified that sensation as a symptom of depression. I did this time and time again. I would feel frustrated, I must be depressed. I cried during a commercial or a movie that, must mean I am depressed. If I thought poorly of someone, or was hurt by a stranger, it was because of my depression clouding my experience. I, of course, did not become aware of just how many emotions I named depression until I started getting Ketamine therapy. It is because of the effects of Ketamine that I can separate myself from my illness. I get to step outside of myself and find clarity where once only suicide resided. I don’t want to get side tracked on the discussion of the disassociative effects of Ketamine, that is a topic for another blog. I will just comment that because of the way Ketamine allows me freedom from my illness, I am capable of feeling an array of emotions. I have literally been forced to learn the differences between the words sad, happy, bitter, angry, resentful, disappointed, mad, glad, blue, heavy-hearted, bad day, tired, sick, exhausted, frustrated, down, unhappy, outraged, anxious, excited, ashamed, and the list goes on and on. In my past, these feelings were put into two categories: depressed and tolerable. It has been so strange. A lesson I was so unaware I needed to learn because of my love of words and their meanings.

Unfortunately, I often confuse my emotions. If I am exhausted, I often mislabel this emotion as depression. I equate many, many feelings for depression. I am learning. Ketamine allows me to recognize the slight variances in my feelings, and this has been beneficial in understanding myself and how depression has affected my life.

I have a goal. I want to eliminate the word depressed from my vocabulary. I only allow myself to describe how I am doing as depressed if I am spending too much time entertaining suicidal thoughts. I search my bank of words and try to redefine my perceptions.

I have spoken to my doctor on many occasions in regards to learning a whole new language and differentiating the subtlety between all these refreshing emotional nuances. I spend a lot of time taking inventory of my feelings and trying really hard to not define every negative emotion I feel as depression. This has been my past. I believe I was not aware of my inability to feel a wide range of feelings. I have made a point of only using the word depressed when the heaviness becomes so unbearable for me that the only appropriate choice in the dictionary is the word depressed. When I lose sight of all hope. I am fortunate that since I was introduced to Ketamine for depression, I have been actively able to understand the various differences in my thoughts and feelings. I am no longer numb. I am feeling.

For many years I felt like all I could do was stand there and want to die. All the thoughts racing in my mind confirmed how worthless I felt. The depression filter was set permanently to the on position. I have always had a fondness for language. I especially love the dictionary and the massive amount of words available to us. I have known for years the definitions of various emotions, but it wasn’t until Ketamine that I recognized how few of my treasured words I actually understood on a personal level.

I am obsessed with this puzzle.

I take inventory often.

I broaden my new emotional language daily. I find this challenging and exciting. I still confuse my feelings with the incorrect definitions. I reflect. I can see patterns. I am capable of rewiring. I try to be gentle with myself during these lessons. I love words. I am disappointed that I am a preschooler emotionally.

I find myself afraid.

Overwhelmed.

I will be kind.

I will try. I will try harder.

I have been struggling.

I was randomly searching online several weeks back for new Ketamine centers and came across an article, The strange symptom of depression most people don’t know about, and I squealed with delight. Yes, a new emotion to add to my personal dictionary. In this feature, the author writes on the subject that I have been insisting is a real thing to my doctor. My total lack of the ability to feel more than the depression filter would allow. Depression numbs. Depression kills. It absorbs all your energy. It steals your light. It is exhausting.

Fighting to stay alive.

Wanting to only die.

Depression kidnaps me. It robs me.

Ketamine is my peace maker. My protector.

Ketamine keeps me focused.

Ketamine is my healer. I am grateful. I appreciate the insights. I am thankful for the education. It helps me see when the depression filters switch on, and it constantly aids me with questions to ask myself to clear up the fog and misunderstandings.

I bring this article to my next Ketamine appointment and smile at my doctor. He is curious. I hand over my phone and ask him to read. He complies. I feel like a student with a new discovery. I have had a hypothesis for a couple years regarding how Ketamine lifts the depression and helps one process the world differently. The disassociative effects that Ketamine blesses me with during my treatments has made my regular usage of “I just need to get out of my own way,” a reality. I am grateful for these brief insights. It makes it possible to see myself without the depression clouding my judgments.

Ketamine.

It is truly perfect the way it is.

Side effects? Really?

Ketamine.

I wouldn’t change a thing about the drug.

Please stop the bad talk.

Ketamine gives me what I need. Hope.

Relief.

Clarity.

It also constantly gives the ability to question. It helps me address chronic behaviors. It opened the door to a whole new language.

As Dr. Demiralp concluded: “Our results suggest that being specific about your negative emotions might be good for you. It might be best to avoid thinking that you are feeling generally bad or unpleasant. Be specific. Is it anger, shame, guilt or some other emotion? This can help you circumvent it and improve your life.”

I had to exclaim to my doctor, “See? I am not the only one that thinks depression limits your emotional language!”

The study stated it nicely.

They found that participants experiencing clinical depression found it difficult to distinguish which negative emotions they were feeling, as opposed to non-depressed people who were clearer about which emotion they were feeling.

Co-author of the study Dr. Emre Demiralp, was quoted by Spring as saying, “It is difficult to improve your life without knowing whether you are sad or angry about some aspect of it. For example, imagine not having a gauge independently indicating the gasoline level of your car. It would be challenging to know when to stop for gas.”

And it has.

I believe it is important to examine your feelings and how you label them.

Increase your emotional language.

It is my goal to recognize and experience each slight shift. Ketamine helps. Depression mask the truth. I want to know the difference between telling myself a fictional tale and reality. That is not an easy task when the depression rules my mind.

I found it reassuring that someone else in the world felt depression limits how we feel and express ourselves and was studying this phenomenon. I have been trying to explain for years now. It is even more important to acknowledge that the depression clouds our perceptions of the world around us.

I question all.

I want to be free from this hell one day.

Fiction or reality?

I may never be completely free from the hateful cave that holds me prisoner whenever it desires. I follow a healthy path and skip with glee. I trip. Damn it. I crawl. Pull myself up. Soldier on. I practice letting go. I can get so angry. I pity myself. I cry out at the injustices. I don’t want to be a victim. I don’t want to be a survivor either.

I want to be.

My doctor loosely quotes George Harrison, show me that I am everything….. take me to the universe, but have me home for tea.

That is Ketamine. It shows me that I am everything. It takes me to the universe and an hour later I am calm and sipping a metaphoric cup of tea.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

Originally posted on The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

December 28 2017

Ketamine Treatments And Benzodiazepines: My Journey And Discoveries

susangayhart Blog abq, agoraphobia, Anesthetist, Anesthisia, antidepressants, anxiety, Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist, clinical depression, death, depressed, depression, depression signals, Duprat, effects without ketamine, emotions, grief, hospitalizations, injection and infusion clinic of ABQ, insomnia, Jason Duprat, ketamine, Ketamine Academy, ketamine day, ketamine effects, ketamine infusions, ketamine shots, Major Depressive Disorder, mental health, mental illness, myketaminestory, panic attacks, suicidal depression, suicide, suicide prevention, suidical depression, symptoms, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of ABQ, treatment resistant depression, treatments

Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

I have learned such a valuable lesson over the last six weeks on how far I have come in my recovery and just how quickly I can slide back into Hell. I have been eagerly wanting to write but unable. I reflect back over the past couple months and I will genuinely admit I wasn’t sure I would live through it. It has been a painful journey back.

I believe in my heart that my downward spiral began on the day I received a flu shot, October 13th, 2017. I have always avoided getting the flu shot because many members of my family get violently ill after receiving one. I have been willing to gamble each year and opt out of getting a flu shot. If I get sick, I will deal with the illness then. I do not knowingly want to inject a virus into my body. I don’t trust my chemical makeup. I have a history with medications and their side effects. I have become somewhat of a purist.

Well, this year I was forced to get a flu shot. I planned time off from work, so just in case I did become ill I would not have to work through it. I photograph newborn babies in a hospital setting. It is mandatory to receive the flu shot. I compiled. The shot compromised my system. It made me weak in mind and body. I truly believe that is where this past visit to darkness injected itself into my life.

I did indeed end up getting the flu. I spent my vacation time in bed. I was bitter. I was disappointed. I rearranged my Ketamine therapy. I avoid getting Ketamine when I am under the weather because I don’t ever want to associate Ketamine with a negative. If I am ever unsure, I reschedule. I have experienced having a cold and a Ketamine treatment. I have also had a sinus infection and have kept my appointments in the past. I found that when I received my Intramuscular Ketamine shot during times when my body is stressed, the Ketamine doesn’t seem to work as efficiently. I can honestly say that I struggled while learning those lessons. I confused being physically sick with being mentally unwell. This made for confusing times for me. I equated being sick in bed with depression. I asked a multitude of questions of myself. It seems so obvious that when you don’t feel well physically you are not going to want to go out and socialize and be cheery. I figured the Ketamine always combats the depression, so why do I still feel like shit?

Following the flu shot, I probably went back to work before I was ready. I was still feeling exhausted and low, mentally. I worked ten days in a row and long hours too. This is not typical. I try to work outside the house for around 20 hours a week. I want to do more. I often can’t say no if asked. I realize, all too often, that I routinely put myself last to help others. I am loyal and pride myself on being professional and representing myself and the company in the best way I possibly can. I do this without thinking. It is natural. I feel I should be able to have a career and work 40 hours a week. I do. Others do it all the time. Unfortunately, my mental illness loves to reek havoc at the most inconvenient times.

I pushed through the long stretch and on day ten I was so proud of myself. I excelled. I usually do when I am working overtime to deny that I am struggling. I stayed focused and determined. I rocked it.

However, there was a problem. My system was still battling the virus I was injected with. I am not a fan. I see that shot now as my undoing, so be patient during the times I rage about the injustices and how much I lost because of one flu shot. I was exhausted. I was confused. I felt lost. Why was I still sick?

I followed the flu with a cold and then a sinus infection. I was juggling my appointments and switching days trying to get my Ketamine on the days I could bring myself to my doctor’s office. At first I would drag myself because I feared not getting Ketamine and having the depressive symptoms return. It was after failing to get the same relief that I typically get following my Ketamine therapy that it occurred to me that maybe it was because I had an infection. It has been a time of discoveries but not without the painful darkness pressing heavily on me.

I do believe that when a person gets a cold, virus or the dreaded flu bug, it will compromise our bodies while the body fights the alien bacteria or virus. My doctor concurred. In fact, he tried to reassure me that I was fighting off infection after infection and that even the best of us feel discouraged and depressed when we are sick.

Say what?!? I thought I was unique. Special.

Doesn’t my doctor know that I am superhuman? I laugh because I tell him so. It is a goal that I never wrote down. It is automatic. Perfection. I want to be beyond Superhuman.

I must be. I want to be. I need to be.

Man, doesn’t Dr. Moseley realize that I strive to be superhuman and damn it I am failing? He is not clueless. He is insightful. If I feel he is missing my constant desire and need to be everything to all people, I wildly state my obsession at random times. He is aware.

He gently reminds me, as we giggle, that I might want to spend more time centering.

I am too tired.

I don’t feel good.

I was annoyed with myself.

I am positive that everyone around me was frustrated too.

I welcome November. I was to celebrate 25 years of marriage, and my husband and I put a contract on a home. That, my friends, are both amazing events. November should have been my staircase up and out. Instead it was an elevator down to that all too familiar pit of despair.

I will make a quick timeline. I welcome a new month in hopes of ridding my body of infections and gain back control of my mind.

I was already spent.

November 6th, I lose one of the most important people in my life. My world shifted. I am still reeling. I still cry easily. I don’t know. I am grieving. I am feeling.

Oh, how I don’t want to be feeling anything. Nothing. Please.

Sedate me. Please.

It was already cloudy and overcast. I can feel the demons. I am weak. I am slipping. I want to care. I don’t.

I don’t want to deal.

Please sedate me. Now.

I went completely down the rabbit hole and asked my doctor for Ativan. I am so against medication that I am known to ramble passionately about how horrible it is and why. I especially detest Benzodiazepines. I could even classify them with ECT for the worst treatments ever. I could even use the word hate. I am not a fan.

I am in the wrong place at the wrong time. My world is crumbling. I am in a dark place and I am out of matches. I am afraid. The noise is getting louder. I can’t focus. I don’t feel confident that I can stop the tragedy about to happen to me. I don’t think Ketamine can fight this for me either. I can’t ask it to. Ketamine has its limits.

Ketamine can’t repair loss. It can’t fix grief. I understand that. I know not to ask Ketamine to do all the work.

My body is failing to recover from illness. I can’t cope. I am feeling suicidal. I am having flashbacks and I fear that I may have to be hospitalized. I had to make a call. Do I let go or fight back? I have worked so hard. How is it that in four weeks things can feel out of control to the point of serious suicidal depression. I was obsessed with death and dying. Surrounded by it.

It was because of my illness, both mentally and physically, that I was forced to resign from a photography position that gave me much joy. I made the decision. It was the right one. I had to save me. Here I am feeling another loss. I am falling. I can’t be normal; ever. I am always fighting to keep myself above the surface. Ketamine lifts the symptoms, but I have years of unhealthy coping techniques still trying to demand my attention.

I resigned. I have lost a vital person in my life. I need support. I need a lot of support. I blindly believe in a recent friendship to help ease the pain and confusion. Only to have that person selfishly turn their back on me when I was in need of a friend. That hurt. I am still in shock. I don’t get it. I judged poorly. I mistakenly took my caring and efforts to help a fellow sufferer to mean the feelings would be reciprocated. This was not the case and instead of talking through an upsetting conversation, he opted to end the friendship. I suppose it never was a mutual relationship.

Another loss.

I am spinning now.

I am so done.

I cringe and shatter.

I resort to the one type of drug I promised myself to avoid at all cost.

Life?

I call and beg my doctor to call in Ativan. Yes, the dreaded Benzodiazepines. I am an absolute failure. It is either Ativan or the hospital. I am so far away from the sun that no one can reach me.

I am afraid.

I fear that suicide will be my last chapter. I wonder if I will always feel that way. It makes me cry. I fear that is my story.

The noise is getting unbearable. The desire to say a permanent goodbye is strong.

I fill the prescription. And I mentally lock the doors. Ativan help me. Please.

I opened a hateful door with the little pill.

I barely make it to my appointment to get Ketamine. I need it. I desperately need it.

Relief.

I am drowning in grief. I can’t breathe. My doctor increases my Ativan. I die a little more inside. I remind myself it is either a Benzodiazepine or the hospital. Just try to stay sedated, I tell myself.

It is now day four of being on 3 mgs of Ativan daily. I am gone. Only my shell remains. I am fighting to make sense out of the insanity screaming in my mind. Not again. What happened with the Ketamine? Why did it only give me relief for one day. Is it because of the Ativan? I am acting out. I am hurting myself. My husband holds me tight. I scream, rage, cry, and beg once again to be sedated.

Please let me sleep. I don’t want to wake. I knew it. My ending will be by my own hand. As I feared. This craziness will never end. Ever. I can end it. I can. I want to.

My husband asked me to fight. He begs me to stay with him. I cry. This is too familiar. It is too painful to go through again. I can’t. I won’t. Why isn’t the Ketamine squashing the suicidal ideation?

I put my hand out again for sleeping and avoiding.

It dawns on me at that moment as I am looking down at the pills in my hand why my world feels empty. I think I have all the answers and they vanish with my hope. I feel pathetically alone and my husband gently whispers that I am not. He is in this with me. I cry. I cry. I cry. I drift off knowing that in the morning I am putting an end to this madness.

I look in the mirror in the morning and I don’t recognize myself. What the hell? Why? I want to give up. I look deeper and ask Susan are you in there? I cry again. I find all I am doing is crying.

Grief.

Medication can’t fix loss.

I cry.

I am hurting. It is grief. I feel it and I don’t want any part of it. I want to be……

I look up and see a vacant little girl. I have seen her before. I want to mother her. She needs a mom. She just lost the only woman that felt like one. She needs me to be stronger than I ever have been in the past. We are better than this illness.

How did it get so dark? Why didn’t the Ketamine target the suicidal thinking? What is different?

I take inventory. I have flashbacks. I feel as though I am drowning again. I know the answer is right there in front of me. Think, think, think.

Bingo.

Benzodiazepines! The antiChrist for sure. A demon. How could I forget my hellacious past and my promise to myself to avoid Benzodiazepines at all cost?

The cost was my life. I weighed my decision. I accepted my choices. I figured temporarily the anti-anxiety medicine was the best option for me. I didn’t want to be admitted to the hospital to keep safe. I would sleep until I was ready. The problem is we are never really ready to grieve and let go. I know I want more memories and hugs. I know it makes tears stream down my face and my chest feel utterly tight and uncomfortable. I am grieving.

I am grieving. I AM GRIEVING!

Once again I confused my emotional language. In the past I felt pretty much numb, and suicidally depressed. It is odd how you can be both feeling pain and feeling nothing at all.

I think about the knife, pills, the necktie and that plastic bag, death. I was surrounding myself in a demented fantasy I was ready to carry out when I drifted off to sleep. My husband woke me in panic asking me random questions about the number of pills and when did I take them. Puzzled. Confused. I look down as he pulls the knife from my hands. He questions everything. What is the plastic bag for? What have you done? Susan, no. Please. I am shocked. What?

And through the fog I hear a voice I long to hear again say to me it is probably the side effects from the Ativan.

Of course.

I started to really examine the recent week. How did I get here holding a knife and screaming for death? How could this be happening to my family again?

I was exhausted. I couldn’t sleep long enough or deep enough to deny the reality. I suffered a lot of losses in November and I tried old behaviors and solutions and once again they failed me. I am convinced that the benzodiazepine Ativan numbed my ability to function and wage war on the madness that is my mental illness and thus lowering my resistance to fight the common theme when I become overwhelmed and overextended, which is to take my life. It seems so drastic to me now. I stopped taking the Ativan and dealt with the horrific side effects and made it to my Ketamine appointment yesterday.

I sat heavily down on my doctor’s sofa and announce that under no circumstance is he to ever give me another benzodiazepine. I reviewed the last two weeks and how incredibly close I came to attempting to end my story forever. I didn’t want to get Ketamine until I was clean of the Ativan in my system because I really feel strongly that benzos are why the Ketamine wasn’t benefiting me as it usually does. I also feel it was inhibiting me from utilizing my healthy coping strategies. It made me numb and sleepy, and more profoundly, it made it impossible to rationalize or have perspective.

I am resurfacing. I continue to be grateful to have Ketamine to help pull me through my difficult times. Last night’s treatment was like a welcome home. A maternal hug from a loving, hopeful, universal mom. I enjoyed it all. I feel like I am on my way. A new journey ahead. I appreciate my logical outlook on the world. I have missed my favored, analytical self. I missed me. I longed to have my ability to differentiate between the mental illness and insanity. It is a very fine line for me. I feel okay with that right now.

It is always interesting for me to write about a depressive episode after getting Ketamine. It all seems surreal and sad. I was out of control. I felt completely lost. I feared how far I tripped and how broken I felt. My emotions are often intense and I am still working on understanding them all.

I plan to discuss the new emotional language I am discovering with the help of Ketamine in a future blog. I have spent many hours thinking about the numerous new emotions I am experiencing now that the depression is being lifted regularly with Ketamine treatments. It has been enlightening and has brought uncertainty at times, but in most situations I am thankful for the education.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why Ketamine could help you. Also, if you would like to become a provider of Ketamine Therapy try enrolling in The Ketamine Academy‘s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course; it is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

Originally posted on The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

November 20 2017

Conversations With The Founder Of The Ketamine Academy And Creator Of The Online Ketamine Infusion Therapy Course

susangayhart Blog, Resources abq, agoraphobia, Anesthetist, Anesthisia, antidepressants, anxiety, Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist, clinical depression, death, depressed, depression, depression signals, Duprat, effects without ketamine, emotions, grief, hospitalizations, injection and infusion clinic of ABQ, insomnia, Jason Duprat, ketamine, Ketamine Academy, ketamine day, ketamine effects, ketamine infusions, ketamine shots, Major Depressive Disorder, mental health, mental illness, myketaminestory, panic attacks, suicidal depression, suicide, suicide prevention, suidical depression, symptoms, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of ABQ, treatment resistant depression, treatments

Hello again and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

I am a huge Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression Advocate. I write about my experiences and journey with Ketamine Therapy on my personal website and also for The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque. I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders.

A brief look at my personal mental health report card includes numerous failed medication cocktails, ECT, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Talk Therapy and hospitalizations, just to name a few. I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they never did for me.

It was a little over two and half years ago that I was introduced to Ketamine for depression. I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

I recently spent a couple hours conversing with the founder of The Ketamine Academy, Mr. Jason Duprat. I asked him an array of questions, probably more than he expected to answer in my phone call to him. I asked a slew of questions in order to compile as much information as I could to help interested parties understand better why this online training program is one of a kind. I highly recommend it.

I am sticking with my standard Q & A format based entirely from my personal interview and the notes I scribbled down during my phone interview last week with Mr. Duprat. I would love to make an eloquent transition from these few sentences acting as an introduction straight into my dialogue and apologize for my laziness.

What is Ketamine?

Ketamine is basically an anesthetic drug that blocks pain. It was first developed in the 1960’s and was used to operate on soldiers during the Vietnam War. In the past, Ketamine has also been used as an animal tranquilizer. However, in more recent years, Ketamine has been a common theme in nightclubs and parties because of the “hallucination” element users have repeatedly enjoyed.

What types of illnesses can Ketamine help?

Ketamine can treat Treatment Resistant Depression and Neuropathic pain or nerve related injuries. There is a longer infusion time necessary for chronic pain conditions. Ketamine infusion for TRD is typically 45-50 minutes. Ketamine infusion therapy can last close to four hours for nerve or chronic pain diagnoses.

Will the Ketamine Academy have a community or forum for interested business owners to discuss the course and share helpful information?

Yes. There will be a discussion forum. We will also have a Facebook page for students to use to address questions, concerns, offer helpful tips, a space to share experiences, and a public forum to ask for suggestions.

What type of information do you wish you could have had available when you started the Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, that the Ketamine Academy will provide?

I would have loved to have known all of the regulations I would need to look up and follow in order to establish myself as a Ketamine provider and open my clinic. I would have liked to know what the Ketamine protocol was and where to locate pertinent information for treating patients with Ketamine.

What do you mean by protocol?

Patient care and procedures, but more so I refer to the protocol for treatment. For example, what are the dosing ranges for Ketamine when administered by IV infusion to successfully treat depression and chronic pain? I had no idea where to locate the information. It would also have been nice to know what supplies I would need to have in my facility and how to order them.

Do you provide all of the forms needed to become a Ketamine provider?

No. We will direct our students to their state for licensing and regulation laws. We do not have any forms on The Ketamine Academy website, because each state has different regulations to follow.

Who can join the Ketamine Academy?

The Ketamine Academy welcomes anyone, but is geared towards Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetists (CRNA), Nurse Practitioners (NP), Physician Assistants (PA) and Physicians. I would like to mention that The Ketamine Academy’s training program can be used as continuing education by students.

What was the most frustrating element about becoming a Ketamine provider that you faced, and how does the Ketamine Academy remedy those discouraging delays?

The most frustrating aspect of becoming a Ketamine provider was definitely sorting through all the regulations. A close second would surely be webpage design and search engine optimization (SEO), an important element to improve business. I can confidently assure you that The Ketamine Academy training course will cover these issues rigorously. The Ketamine Academy accomplishes this goal by providing all of the information necessary to open your Ketamine clinic in one concentrated location. I would have loved having this training program available to me and feel this course has purpose, and practitioners will greatly benefit from my experience and the comprehensive online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course.

Will students of the Ketamine Academy have access to new information, if available, after the completion of the course?

Yes. I am planning to implement email notifications to students on updates to the website.

Interesting. I really like being informed of changes and updates to a website. When The Ketamine Academy is using its mailing list, what will be included in these emails?

The Ketamine Academy will send website updates and all relevant course changes. When we discover new and exciting Ketamine related stories or studies, we will share these with our students, too.

Will you be continuously adding to the course content?

We are currently adding content regularly to the training program. However, once the course is completed and launched on December 1, 2017, very little will be added to the course outline. There are discussion forums that will be active and worth reviewing for additional support.

Will direct access to the instructor be available?

Absolutely.

The Ketamine Academy will also have an active Facebook page.

Once a business has been established, is that the end of the Ketamine Academy’s involvement?

Yes and no. Once you enroll in our course you will be placed on our mailing list and you will continue to receive updates when there are changes to the course content. The Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course includes 5 hours of mentorship. We also have additional consultation offers. You can purchase extended one-on-one time with the instructor. Don’t hesitate to contact me with any questions you may have, and I will be happy to address them.

How did you decide to put together a training course to help individuals become Ketamine providers?

I had an overwhelming amount of inquiries requesting information on how to become a Ketamine provider. There were so many questions being sent my way. I decided to investigate the internet, and through my research, I discovered there was no online program available to help practitioners set up a Ketamine clinic to provide Ketamine infusions for Treatment Resistant Depression and chronic pain. I wanted to create a program that would walk a health care professional step by step through the process of becoming a Ketamine provider. I also saw a value in making my program an online course that would have open access, 24/7, to cater to the needs of all types of students. I finally decided to move forward with The Ketamine Academy when I determined that there was really no reasonably priced training course available. I found a couple of doctors offering to help you establish a Ketamine center with two major drawbacks: you have to apply and be accepted, and the cost was over 10,000 dollars. I felt this limits the potential to reach more sufferers because the reality is there are not too many CRNA, NP, PA or doctors that can afford such a steep price, and that is if you are accepted as a client. I wanted to help interested people avoid the mistakes I made, as well as give a comprehensive, step by step, proven method to assist practitioners in becoming business owners and Ketamine providers.

If anyone is interested in becoming a Ketamine provider, what is the first thing they should do? I mean, besides reserving a spot in the Ketamine Academy training program, what is the first thing you suggest students starting the Ketamine Infusion program do?

I guess if you are a nurse practitioner, you should start by reading the Practice Act. Doctors can start by analyzing the market. They do not need to read the Practice Act. The program will have open access, so you can literally start anywhere. You can hop around and read what interests you or select the first link and work your way through the program systematically.

Now that they have signed up for the course, what is the first thing they will learn?

I suggest reading down the list and start with the selection that covers your most pressing questions and concerns. There really is no right or wrong way to approach the program. I built this program to appeal to all learning styles. I have videos, written content, template forms that have proven to work, audio clips, interview with a ketamine patient, quizzes, and more. I tried to address all learning styles.

You can begin at any spot in the program and cherry pick what information you specifically need or you could start with our topic list. It is built in the order you would benefit and your new business too. The first topic is All About Ketamine, but like I said you can freely select the information that is most relevant and skip around the topics in the program list to suit your personal needs.

How much money is involved in running a Ketamine clinic?

That is an open ended question because it will vary state to state based on the laws in the state where you reside. I would say as low as $20,000 if you are a do-it-yourself kind of person. If you outsource, it might be as high as $50,000. You have several initial costs, such as for equipment like chairs and medical supplies. You will need a computer system, and employees. There is the cost of obtaining a trademark and logo. There are licensing fees, marketing, and insurance costs. You will have a rental agreement and most require a security deposit, adding to the set up costs. You will have monthly and annual expenses and that can vary from state to state. If you hire a lawyer or accountant, that will increase the amount you pay out each year. The training course will cover these issues in depth, helping each provider avoid costly mistakes.

How long did it take your clinic to recoup it’s startup costs?

It took me about three and a half months, but I worked non stop. I might go as far to say maybe it took five months, but that is mainly because I did everything myself, and I tend to be very focused and driven. An average person working 40 hours per week may take longer to recoup the start up costs; six to eight months. If you outsource all the preparation and business elements, you are probably looking at a year or more to find yourself in the black, but it is pretty subjective and could be more or less depending on the person.

That’s pretty impressive, given that most startup businesses can take years to accomplish being in the black. Do you feel if you had had a training course like the Ketamine Academy, you might have been capable of saving money?

Yes. I would have saved time and money. I truly believe that.

Do you feel that with the Ketamine Academy, you could save money long-term by avoiding expensive pitfalls? If so, how?

I do. The Ketamine training course will help you read and understand the Nurse Practice Act. It will assist you in determining your scope of practice. This alone will save you hours of research; time spent in locating the information needed to give the answers you will benefit from; saving you time and money. The Ketamine training course will allow you to move forward with your new business opportunity. The course will cover taxes, creating an employee handbook, hiring techniques, insurance costs and it will even offer steps for picking a location and negotiating rental agreements. The Ketamine Infusion Therapy Training Course will cover licensing and could possibly save you time and money by directing you to what forms to fill out for your business, thus avoiding fees from filling out unnecessary paperwork.

Is it your hope that the Ketamine Academy will become a central location for all things Ketamine?

No, not really. I am more interested in providing training and education to interested health care professionals. I will add that each Ketamine center is privately owned. This is not a franchise or an extension of the Injection & Infusion Center of ABQ. The Ketamine Academy will help you, step by step, in opening your own private Ketamine business. It will offer assistance but your practice is private and patient care is personalized per clinic and provider.

Will the Ketamine Academy have any services for patients, or is the course mainly for health care providers?

The Ketamine Academy is primarily for practitioners looking to invest in themselves and provide a wonderful service to a much needed community.

What is Ketamine used for?

Ketamine has only been FDA-approved as an anesthetic for surgery and diagnostic procedures. That status has not really changed over the last few years, as some might expect, given the fact Ketamine has been featured in medical journals and news magazines.

In 2017, Ketamine is now being successfully used to treat depression, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, OCD, post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), other mood disorders, and nerve-related pain.

Do you feel that the Ketamine Academy is really necessary for someone to become a provider? Why?

Yes. The average person that works a full time job does not have the time to invest in researching state regulations and licencing laws. An average practitioner may lose time and money on costly mistakes such as filing unnecessary papers that your state doesn’t require you to file. This also causes delays in opening your clinic, punishing your bottom line more than necessary.

Will the Ketamine Academy provide Continuing Education credits?

Yes. We are excited to be able to have submissions possible for several continuing education accreditation programs. Once the training course is completed it will qualify for Continuing Education Units (CEU).

What type of continuing education credits will the course offer?

There are several divisions or classes that offer credits that can qualify for continuing education. There arre Class A and Class B – categories – for lack of a better term right now. The difference is based primarily on whether a program or course includes comprehensive exams. There are also different types of accreditation based on job titles. For example: an allergy clinic might issue CME credits, a nurse will apply for CE credits and CRNA’s apply for CEU. If you are unsure if The Ketamine Academy can be submitted and used to fulfill your employer’s continuing education requirement, email Jason for clarification.

It states on The Ketamine Academy website that participants will receive five hours of mentoring following completion of the course. Could you elaborate?

Sure. I am dedicated to helping each person that enrolls in the training course. I will be available to help via video chats, email, the Facebook Ketamine Academy page, phone calls- in fact, I supply my personal cell phone number for more direct and easy communication. The mentoring/consult is designed to help assist in the complete set up of your Ketamine clinic. We also offer on-site training for an in-depth, hands on approach to covering the Ketamine protocol.

What is on-site training?

Clinical rotation. On the job training. We will travel to your new Ketamine clinic and provide hands on clinical training. We demonstrate the day to day tasks. It is face to face, in-house training to further assist a client with our clinic’s protocol, but it will be conducted primarily in their office. The course provides clinical rotation training in our Albuquerque clinic, but we are open to traveling.

Please email Jason if you are interested in arranging special on-site training.

I have now enrolled in The Ketamine Academy, will all of the content be immediately available to me?

Yes. All the course work has been uploaded to the Ketamine Academy website. Once you have enrolled in the ketamine infusion training program, all of the course content and information will be accessible to each student 24/7.

Once I am enrolled in the course, what type of content can I expect to see?

The course includes video tutorials, audio files, a photo gallery of the inside of our clinical shop, research, templates for clinic forms and employee handbook to name only a couple. The templates will be extremely beneficial. We will also have an interview with a Ketamine patient. I am sure I am forgetting to mention some aspect of the course. It will encompass everything you need to know and what you need to address in order to become a Ketamine provider. We will also offer clinical rotation in our clinic in ABQ; also the possibility of in-clinic, hands on training once your Ketamine business is established. We offer around 5 or 6 hours of mentoring. Consultations can be face to face, over the phone, or by video chat. We are open to traveling to assist as well, so feel free to contact me with any specific questions.

Will the Ketamine Academy be the type of program that employers might reimburse the tuition for?

Yes. I think some employers might pay for a client or employee to enroll in the program. I also know that if you self-pay for the Ketamine Infusion Therapy Course, you could get a tax write off.

In our discussion today, you mentioned mastermind groups. What are they, and how are they beneficial?

Mastermind groups typically consist of highly experienced business professionals and medical providers collaborating together. These groups are generally an excellent method for brain storming, sharing experiences, discussing successes and helpful tips for troubleshooting. I really want to put together a mastermind group that will meet a couple times a year in a central location. We could share our business and health care experiences and learn from one another. These groups help limit possible pitfalls because of the combination of talent and experience.

And everybody wants to know, will there be a test?

Yes, there will be comprehensive quizzes. It helps qualify the training course for continuing education units (CEU)

Many thanks to Jason Duprat for his time and candor. I enjoyed our Ketamine discussions and am looking forward to hearing about the success of your new venture. I am grateful for the time and passion you devoted to The Ketamine Academy and the training program. I am thrilled to know that there is now a Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course for interested practitioners. I absolutely love that health care professionals can participate in a program and gain intense personal satisfaction and knowledge that they will soon be opening a low cost Ketamine clinic that might just be a city in your area.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions.

I hope these personal blogs from a patient that suffered for over four decades with treatment resistant depression will be helpful in convincing you why enrolling in The Ketamine Academy‘s online Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course is an excellent decision. The Ketamine Academy online program will surely benefit you and the mental health community.

I want to know, after everything you have read, are you seeking a new opportunity and the personal freedom business ownership could offer you? If so, head over to The Ketamine Academy and get a jump on early enrollment specials.

Just think, if you enrolled in The Ketamine Academy your new clinic could easily be added to my directory for the grand opening!

Originally posted on The injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ

November 5 2017

Introducing The Ketamine Academy: An Online Ketamine Provider Training Course

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Hello and welcome. It is Susan from myketaminestory.com.

As a brief summary, I write about my experiences and journey with Ketamine Therapy on my website, The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, as well as, The Boise Ketamine Clinic. I have a long history with treatment resistant depression and anxiety disorders. My personal mental health care resume includes numerous failed medication cocktails, ECT, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Talk Therapy and hospitalizations. I admit I understand how all of these treatments could potentially help, but they never did for me. It was a little over two and half years ago that I was introduced to Ketamine for depression. I am alive today because of a drug that is raising many questions and concerns from the professional world.

I wrote a four part series answering questions about Ketamine use, based on my experience with Ketamine therapy over the past 2.5 years, for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ.

My first blog, Ketamine: Addressing Questions & Concerns focused on my early experience with Ketamine Infusions. In part two of the series, Addressing Questions & Concerns About Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression I addressed questions and concerns about Intramuscular Ketamine verses Ketamine Infusion therapy. In my third blog, Frequently Asked Questions: Redefining Depression With The Assistance Of Ketamine Therapy, I was a bit more random. I had emails with several questions and themes and I addressed as many inquiries as I could. In my final question and answer dialogue, Pondering Concerns & Questions: The Benefits Of Ketamine For Treatment Resistant Depression, I discussed research, clinical studies, and the need for changes to occur within our insurance companies and federal government so that maybe one day Ketamine will not be so difficult to afford or obtain from any qualified professional.

In my latest blog for The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ I am so incredibly excited to announce, The Ketamine Academy. The Ketamine Academy is a new online training program to help practitioners learn a step by step, proven method, for becoming a Ketamine provider. I have been wanting to shout of this news for weeks now. I wanted to mention the Q & A blog series I have previously written to help cover Ketamine information I may not addressed in this blog series because of my enthusiasm with the introduction of the Ketamine Infusion Training Course.

I am truly stoked to finally have a perfect response to those of you reaching out to me wanting to know more about Ketamine therapy. I have had so many people email me or seek me out to ask how they can become a Ketamine provider. In the past, I have attempted to help by assisting in introductions or making calls to connect the questions with a person that had experience and was willing to share their time and knowledge. I can honestly say that I never felt like those forced conversations were enough information or an adequate representation of the importance of safe low cost Ketamine centers to me and others suffering, lost, in pain, and hopelessly in the dark. I wanted to give more. I am driven to advocate. I want to educate. There is definitely a need.

It was discouraging and often frustrating trying multiple times to get two busy professionals on a conference call together in order for their inquiries to get answered correctly. I have been researching and putting together a Ketamine Provider & Location list for close to a year now hoping to help those suffering with Treatment Resistant Depression find hope. That is what Ketamine offered and continues to give me; hope. I am not the only person that saw a huge need for an online program to educate and assist people in becoming a knowledgeable Ketamine Provider.

I have devoted my full attention and the next three blog posts exclusively to explaining what The Ketamine Academy is and why I am thrilled by the prospect of an online training course dedicated to helping qualified individuals build their own unique business and assist in growing the number of safe locations available nationwide to provide Ketamine therapy to those suffering with treatment resistant illnesses. Ketamine has shown such positive results in minimizing the symptoms of depression as well as several neuropathic pain conditions. I find comfort and relief routinely with Intramuscular Ketamine shots and I don’t see that changing. I strive to make Ketamine a well known drug for treatment resistant depression in hopes of bringing one more tortured being into the light where they can find moments of symptom free living.

In this first of a three part series I will introduce you to The Ketamine Academy. I will review what fabulous content and benefits you could obtain by enrolling in the Ketamine Infusion course. This Ketamine Infusion training course is being offered to all qualified Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetists (CRNA), nurse practitioners (NP), physician assistants (PA) and physicians alike. I am ecstatic be writing on such a wonderful and potentially helpful training course.

Be sure to join me the next couple weeks for part two and three of this blog series where I share my interview with, Jason Duprat, the creator of The Ketamine Academy and this much needed online Ketamine Provider Training Program. I spoke in depth with Mr. Duprat and look forward to blogging about our conversation on relevant Ketamine news in a two part informative interview.

The founder and owner of The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ, Mr. Jason Duprat, has put together a comprehensive online training course. As the founder of The Injection and Infusion Clinic of Albuquerque, a full time anesthesia provider and course developer, the content included in this course relies upon Jason’s rich academic and clinical experience with Ketamine.

The Ketamine Infusion Therapy Program offered at The Ketamine Academy is a detailed program that combines theory with clinical practice; meaning research meets lessons learned with on-the-job experience. This program includes all major aspects of Ketamine therapy that have practical clinical use and pertinent business value. The teaching approach is derived from Jason Duprat’s clinical experience and the scientific research of Ketamine infusion therapy conducted in clinical trails and research studies. The Ketamine Academy’s program is one of the only standardized, coordinated and comprehensive training programs in the use of Ketamine.

Once again, this online training program is designed for Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetists (CRNA), nurse practitioners (NP), physicians assistants (PA) and physicians. The program will provide you with tested and proven lessons learned so you can get your clinic up and running in a smooth and hassle free way. There is absolutely no reason now to get caught up in the fear of costly pitfalls. This course will guide you through the entire process, potentially saving you hours in research, stress and doubt. Not to mention the potential of saving thousands of dollars in costly mistakes, you know the ones, those dreaded mistakes that we learn only from heavy challenges and obstacles most of us will run into along the way. I think any start up business has these painful time consuming lessons. However, with the help of The Ketamine Academy’s training course you may be fortunate enough to skip these pricey delays because this program prepares you for what you will need to do to accomplish that end goal of being a business owner, Ketamine provider, your own boss, and a provider of hope.

Mr. Duprat created The Ketamine Academy to help others, like him, interested in providing low cost Ketamine treatments to other suffering from Treatment Resistant Depression and Chronic Pain. Jason’s ultimate goal with The Ketamine Academy’s training program is ensuring that every student completing the course is competent in their Ketamine knowledge, infusion therapy techniques and is ready to incorporate it into practice. During my recent interview with Jason Duprat about The Ketamine Academy, we spoke in depth about his new training program and website going live. Jason informed me that the Ketamine Infusion Therapy Program is now open for early enrollment for those interested in saving a spot, and I encourage you to sign up. We need more clinics offering low cost Ketamine for Treatment Resistant Depression.

During our conversation, which I plan to write extensively on in my next couple blogs, Jason elaborated on why he felt compelled to put this course together and what he hopes qualified practitioners will take away from the program. Jason shared how he wanted more freedom in the work place. The long shifts at the hospital, those hours were starting to take a toll. He has the same dream we all have at some point in our lives and that is to be our own boss.

Jason also eloquently expressed to me that after discovering how Ketamine was helping treatment resistant depression patients from a fellow colleague, he knew what direction he needed to go and started his quest to become a Ketamine provider in New Mexico.

Jason discovered Albuquerque really needed a Ketamine clinic, and because of his education and background, he was in a position to move forward and open his clinic, The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ. With his anesthesia background, Jason has gained extensive experience with Ketamine. He is knowledgeable about all aspects of Ketamine pharmacology and administration. Jason is the sole owner and primary provider for his Ketamine Infusion clinic, which is located in Albuquerque, New Mexico. It was in his Injection and Infusion clinic that Mr. Duprat gained the real world experience needed to become a skillful specialist in the area of opening Ketamine clinics. He also has become an authority on the use of ketamine infusion therapy for mood disorders and chronic pain.

Jason insisted during our interview, and I believe him, that he is planning to be extremely accessible to those that participate in the program. Mr. Duprat assured me that he will help in any way he can as you get your clinic set up and operational. Jason learned a tremendous amount of valuable information during the process of setting up his operation. The training course will surely review unnecessary errors you could make. Jason made his share of mistakes that cost him valuable time and money. We discussed his nemesis by the name; regulations. It is difficult finding the time to research especially if you are working a full time job. It gets even trickier if you are a student trying to complete your MBA.

Time is crucial.

Priceless.

The hours spent locating the correct information can be overwhelming and discouraging to say the least. Jason brings all his experience, the crushing failures and the more positive successes, to the course and shares a step by step process for opening up a Ketamine clinic.

Join me next week for the full interview and an inside look at this amazing Ketamine Infusion Therapy training course.

I asked Mr. Duprat some tough questions during my interview with him about The Ketamine Academy, and I was very impressed with his responses. I sincerely feel that he has put together a complete program.

The instructor will invest extensive amounts of personal attention with each student because Jason wants you to leave the course feeling prepared and confident. This program will provide you everything you need to know in order to develop a successful Ketamine Infusion Therapy Clinic. I will point out that The Ketamine Academy is not just a training program for start-up business owners – this course can also assist those individuals wanting to incorporate Ketamine infusions into their current practice.

I was recently visiting The Ketamine Academy website and read that the course is for practitioners who are interested in entering the exciting world of entrepreneurship. I agree. I think the Ketamine Infusion Therapy Program will guide you step-by-step on how to open your own cash-based clinic. I think it will also give you a valuable education on Ketamine and how this new drug therapy could potentially change or save a life. Ketamine is a game changer.

This training course is necessary, extremely necessary, in my opinion. There is going to be a higher demand for Ketamine centers now that this “old” drug is making the news. People suffering with chronic pain and treatment resistant depression are going to be searching for a facility in their area. Ketamine is a hot topic. Ketamine has made it all the way to TIME magazine.

TIME placed Ketamine on the cover of their August 7th, 2017 issue. It makes a Ketamine advocate like me very happy to see a big publication splashing their covers with HOPE.

Ketamine is finding its way into conversations; more and more every day.

According to The Ketamine Academy website their program could assist you in opening a clinic capable of generating gross revenues of over $1,000,000. The Ketamine Academy provides the only standardized, coordinated and comprehensive training program focused on Ketamine education and creating your very own private Ketamine practice.

Freedom.

You can become your own boss while simultaneously helping offer hope to those, like me, that believe optimism exists only in motivational posters.

I was pleased when Mr. Duprat notified me that he was going to be offering a training course to help Ketamine provider get established. I was over the moon. I have a strong motivation to get more low cost Ketamine centers opened. Ketamine, this drug works and more individuals need access to it. It offers me color in my life again.

I have written on how I feel Ketamine surrounds me in a colorful warmth and drapes me in refreshing bright light and soothes me. I had a recent Ketamine session that crystallized how important color is to me and inspired my last piece, Pulling Back The Darkness With The Use Of Ketamine Therapy. I feel color. I have lived in darkness my entire life. Decade after decade. I wasn’t clueless. I knew I was missing the passion and love I now have for vibrant colors. Ketamine is colorful Hope. The Ketamine Academy might just make it possible for more health professionals to risk thinking outside the box and becoming their own boss. The course provides more than just education. It also has built in support. Fear can keep us all frozen and stuck in place. It is our own limitations that keep us back. We are capable.

Our doubts undermine us.

Another outstanding point to mention is how The Ketamine Academy addresses the hiccups in our own expectations and how that influences the success of any of our life endeavors, and specifically how it directly relates to becoming a Ketamine provider and small business owner.

The Ketamine Academy offers the most flexible Ketamine training program in the nation. You can access the course information online at any time. The course information is available to you 24/7.

I noticed when I was reviewing the training program on The Ketamine Academy website for enrollment options, they state in the course description that their online didactic component will be a self-study course to be completed prior to initiating clinical training. The online component is asynchronous and can be completed at your leisure. They will also work to accommodate a clinical training experience that fits any busy schedule. Therefore, the clinical experience rotations will be available on an as-needed basis. The flexibility is definitely very attractive to the insomniac in me. It makes me want to add another positive in my review of the course. I am seeing a pattern on my pro/con list. I have yet to detect a negative to enrolling in the Ketamine Academy. I am a born worrier and negativity surrounds us all. I immediately scan the website for the cost. That is where I am sure I will find fault.

I have researched programs that assist interested qualified health care practitioners become Ketamine providers and the options are limited and costly. I located two facilities offering to assist you in set up. It is expensive. I think it is out of this world expensive. The short term cost would keep me away. It cost close to 10,000 dollars to accept help setting up your own center. You may also find yourself in a situation where you are continuing to pay a long term cost of 40% of your future revenue. At The Ketamine Academy if you pay-in-full it is a reduced price of only $2,499! The website also has another method of covering the cost of the course with the payment option of 3 easy payments of 966.00 each. I feel as a business start up cost and the luxury of working for yourself providing a life saving therapy the cost is manageable. I will note here that The Ketamine Academy is offering a free trial, so why not give this opportunity some consideration? It is realistic for many of you. Bet on yourself.

The Ketamine Academy has potential to change your life. It will change the many lives of the Ketamine Infusion recipients and their family and friends.

The Ketamine Infusion Training Program is Doable. You will have the support you need from the moment you enroll straight through to opening day.

Exciting.

Join me next week when I share my part one of my Interview with the creator of The Ketamine Academy, Jason Duprat. Until then keep please keep educating yourself and others on the importance of Ketamine Therapy for Treatment Resistant Depression.

In conclusion, If you know of anyone suffering with treatment resistant depression, like I do, let them know that Ketamine therapy may be an option worth looking into. It has been and continues to offer me relief from my symptoms. If you or someone you know are considering Ketamine infusion therapy, please visit www.infusionclinicabq.com for low cost ketamine infusion and injection options. If you are not in the Albuquerque, New Mexico area I also suggest approaching a local professional and start educating them on the benefits of Ketamine. Again, it doesn’t hurt to ask for what you need.

Originally posted on The Injection & Infusion Clinic of ABQ